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Describe an activity that you do when you have free time

Describe an activity that you do when you have free time 3ARVn
Today I’m going to talk about a hobby that i spent all my free time on it. and this is surfing on the internet and collecting information from it. To be honest, I’m an introvert so when i have free time i passed this time all by myself and i can enjoy this hobby anywhere but most of time is in my home. Surfing on the web has officially become my hobby since I got a laptop, maybe about 5 years up to this day. At that time, i want to explore my laptop and practice self-educated by searching for online lessons on the internet and i truly realize that this activity is so neat, so interesting. Especially, I picked up various information and including knowledge for my studies. Additionally, I also collect a lot of data about my major and make new friends. On the other hand, Surfing on the internet help me learn new languages and stimulate my mind and brain. Spending leisure time on wandering online makes my time not elapse in a useless way and this is the reason that when i have free time, i always surf the internet
Today
I’m going to talk about a hobby that
i
spent all my free
time
on it. and this is surfing on the internet and collecting information from it. To be honest, I’m an introvert
so
when
i
have free
time
i
passed this
time
all by myself and
i
can enjoy this hobby anywhere
but
most of
time
is in my home. Surfing on the web has
officially
become my hobby since I
got
a laptop, maybe about 5 years up to this day. At that
time
,
i
want to explore my laptop and practice self-educated by searching for online lessons on the internet and
i
truly
realize that this activity is
so
neat,
so
interesting.
Especially
, I picked up various information and including knowledge for my studies.
Additionally
, I
also
collect
a lot of
data about my major and
make
new friends.
On the other hand
, Surfing on the internet
help
me learn new languages and stimulate my mind and brain. Spending leisure
time
on wandering online
makes
my
time
not elapse
in a useless way
and this is the reason that when
i
have free
time
,
i
always surf the
internet
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IELTS essay Describe an activity that you do when you have free time

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
193 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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