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Talk about a time when you got lost in a town/city

Talk about a time when you got lost in a town/city D2LNj
So, I am going to talk about an incident that happened to me, which I never forget. It occurred in 2018 about 3 years ago. In summer vacations my parents planned a trip for me and my brother because we got good academic results. So my parents decided to travel to Australia as a present for us. Then on the 5th day, we arrived in Sydney in the afternoon, so the first place we went to is a mall center, it was huge and crowded. I went along with the whole group, and I was so excited to see how many brands are sell in the mall. There was a strange brand that attracted me, so I looked at this shop for about 10 minutes. At that time, I realized that my group was going somewhere else because they disappeared in my view. The first people I can remember at that time were my parents, so I call my mother straightway. Then she told me the shop's name that our group stand in front of and guided me on the way to find them. After a while, I finally found them, I felt really lucky and a bit proud of myself. To be honest, I felt quite scared at first but I calmed down and think the solution. And yeah, I solved the problem well. Yup, that's it.
So
, I am going to talk about an incident that happened to me, which I never forget. It occurred in 2018 about 3 years ago. In summer vacations my parents planned a trip for me and my brother
because
we
got
good
academic results.
So
my parents decided to travel to Australia as a present for us.

Then on the 5th day, we arrived in Sydney in the afternoon,
so
the
first
place we went to is a mall center, it was huge and crowded. I went along with the whole group, and I was
so
excited to
see
how
many
brands are sell in the mall. There was a strange brand that attracted me,
so
I looked at this shop for about 10 minutes. At that time, I realized that my group was going somewhere else
because
they disappeared in my view.

The
first
people
I can remember at that time were my parents,
so
I call my mother straightway. Then she
told
me the shop's name that our group stand in front of and guided me on the way to find them.

After a while, I
finally
found them, I felt
really
lucky and a bit proud of myself. To be honest, I felt quite scared at
first
but
I calmed down and
think
the solution. And yeah, I solved the problem well. Yup, that's it.
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IELTS essay Talk about a time when you got lost in a town/city

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
228 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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