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Talk about a family member

Talk about a family member YwYAj
There are 7 members in my family – my grandparents, my parents, my younger brother, my little sister, and me. There is a big gap between me and my sister. I am 15 years older than her. She is a chubby girl with a pair of big round eyes. Her skin is bright and soft, it makes me want to pinch her cheeks. She is going to enter kinder garden this autumn but because of the Covid-19, she has to stay at home so I become her teacher. I teach her reading and painting. Play with her it's so fun I want to spend all day just playing with her. She sings so well. She can remember the lyrics after listening to them a few times even though she can’t read them. She loves drawing, she draws all over the wall and desks in our house, and then I have to clean them. Although she is very naughty, sometimes she is adorable. I love her very much.
There are 7 members in my family
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
my grandparents, my parents, my younger brother, my
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
sister, and me. There is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
gap between me and my sister. I am 15 years older than her. She is a chubby girl with a pair of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
round eyes. Her skin is bright and soft, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
me want to pinch her cheeks. She is going to enter kinder garden this autumn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the Covid-19, she
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
stay at home
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I become her teacher. I teach her reading and painting. Play with her it's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
fun I want to spend all day
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
playing with her. She sings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
well. She can remember the lyrics after listening to them a few times
even though
she can’t read them.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
She
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loves
drawing, she draws all over the wall and desks in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
, and then I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
clean them. Although she is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
naughty,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
she is adorable. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
her
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much.
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IELTS essay Talk about a family member

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
167 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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