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Successful sports professionals earn a lot of more money than people in other important professions. Some people think that this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion. v.1

Successful sports professionals earn a lot of more money than people in other important professions. Some people think that this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. v. 1
Sports, which was not given much importance till the recent past, but is now one of the most opted careers. Youngsters love to build careers in the athletic field. One makes a career in sports as they feel it can now become a profession, which was once a passion, when passion becomes profession obviously it is going to yield better results. I agree, successful sports professionals earn a lot of money than people in other important professions. The reasons are many, a sports person earns a fortune if he/ she wins a match, they don’t go empty handed even if they lose. But it is not the case with others, say it in business, corporate or any other sector. You win and earn, you lose and you get nothing. Today advertisement has opened the scope for successful sports people, they are chosen for commercials and they earn some extra money there too, not only that, they are invited as chief guests at places and they get a good amount there too. I feel it is fully justified as they have achieved their success with a lot of effort and what they are getting is the result of the hard work. So, let it be from the playing zone, the ads or some other place, they are getting what they deserve! Not everyone would think the same way, few people are of the opinion that other officials, business person has a ‘win and achieve’ or ‘loses and go’ life. So that should be the case with all, irrespective of what the individual does, and they think it is very much unfair on the part of the sports person to earn huge amount.
Sports
, which was not
given
much importance till the recent past,
but
is
now
one of the most opted careers. Youngsters
love
to build careers in the athletic field.

One
makes
a career in
sports
as they feel it can
now
become a profession, which was once a passion, when passion becomes profession
obviously
it is going to yield better results. I
agree
, successful
sports
professionals
earn
a lot of
money than
people
in
other
important
professions. The reasons are
many
, a
sports
person
earns
a fortune if he/ she wins a match, they don’t go
empty handed
even if they lose.
But
it is not the case with others, say it in business, corporate or any
other
sector. You win and
earn
, you lose and you
get
nothing.

Today
advertisement has opened the scope for successful
sports
people
, they
are chosen
for
commercials and
they
earn
some
extra money there too, not
only
that, they
are invited
as chief guests at
places and
they
get
a
good
amount there too.

I feel it is
fully
justified as they have achieved their success with
a lot of
effort and what they are getting is the result of the
hard
work.
So
,
let
it be from the playing zone, the ads or
some
other
place, they are getting what they deserve!

Not everyone would
think
the same way, few
people
are of the opinion that
other
officials, business person has a ‘win and achieve’ or ‘loses and go’ life.
So
that should be the case with all, irrespective of what the individual does, and they
think
it is
very
much unfair on the part of the
sports
person to
earn
huge amount.
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Successful sports professionals earn a lot of more money than people in other important professions. Some people think that this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
281 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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