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Space Travel is one of the priorities of advanced countries realizing the significance of the exploration. However Third world countries prefer to address the basic needs of their people rather than engaging in space discoveries. W/c is more impotant priority? Give your reasons to support your answer.

Space Travel is one of the priorities of advanced countries realizing the significance of the exploration. However Third world countries prefer to address the basic needs of their people rather than engaging in space discoveries. W/c is more impotant priority? Give your reasons to support your answer. RVMaW
In some rich countries they focus more on space travel for exploration & new discoveries. But for developing Nations is it more important to give attention & prioritize the necessities of their people Exploring the space needs a big fund that only a develop country can provide like the United States of America they have Nasa where in astronauts are paid to go outer space for development and new discoveries for human Habitat. Opportunity to Discover new Destination that can somehow help to protect the earth. It’s a big news when such country found a new destination, wherein it will be include in the conuntries history. On the other side of the world, specially in the third world countries, there is a more important needs the we should prioritize. To emphasize such issue, for example the country Iive in the Philippines. There are families that experiencing poverty, almost half of our total population are identified as poor families. We need to address the basic needs in order to prevent worsening of te situation, that causes more people to get sick, commit a crime, or even mortality rate. My stand is that we should prioritize first what people needs, it is part of their physiologic need as human beings. Many young infant and children are severely underweight, young adults are out of school, many head of the family are behind bars commiting a crime just to provide food for the family. So I stongly agree that we should give attention to the primary needs of our country men.
In
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some
rich
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countries
they focus more on space travel for exploration &
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
discoveries.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
for developing Nations is it more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to give attention & prioritize the necessities of their
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
people


Exploring the space
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needs
a
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big
fund that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
After 'a', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'develop' is correct. If 'develop' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
a develop
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country
can provide like the United States of America they have
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nasa
where in astronauts
are paid
to go outer space for development and
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new
discoveries for human Habitat. Opportunity to Discover
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
Destination that can somehow
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to protect the earth. It’s a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
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news
when such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
found a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
destination, wherein it will be
Consider using the past participle "included"?
include
in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
conuntries
history. On the other side of the world,
specially
in the third world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, there is a more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
Possible typo. Did you mean "the" or "we"?
the we
should prioritize. To emphasize such issue,
for example
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
Possible spelling mistake found.
Iive
in the Philippines. There are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
that experiencing poverty, almost half of our total population
are identified
as poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
. We
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to address the basic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
worsening of
Possible spelling mistake found.
te
situation, that causes more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
sick, commit a crime, or even mortality rate.

My stand is that we should prioritize
first
what
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
needs
, it is part of their physiologic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
as human beings.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
young infant and children are
severely
underweight, young adults are out of school,
Possible agreement error. The noun head seems to be countable; consider using: "many heads".
many head
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
are behind bars
Possible spelling mistake found.
commiting
a crime
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to provide food for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I
Possible spelling mistake found.
stongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that we should give attention to the primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
.

IELTS essay Space Travel is one of the priorities of advanced countries realizing the significance of the exploration. However Third world countries prefer to address the basic needs of their people rather than engaging in space discoveries. W/c is more impotant priority? Give your reasons to support your answer.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
257 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • Space Travel is one of the priorities of advanced countries realizing the significance of the exploration. However Third world countries prefer to address the basic needs of their people rather than engaging in space discoveries. W/c is more impotant priority? Give your reasons to support your answer.