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Space exploration is a costly project. The money would be much better spend on reducing social problems

Space exploration is a costly project. The money would be much better spend on reducing social problems xmeja
Although many countries spend more money to explorer space, many people think that the government should use that money to decreasing issues of social. I agree with the improvement country is more significant than explorer space. In my opinion, basic public service is necessary to humans in every country. I will examine my view in this essay. First and foremost, Educational that the children should have identical knowledge, urban city and rural area that the main problem for developing children' knowledge, such as, in Indonesia where the country has more than 1, 000 islands, in some islands are lack of educating compare with the capital city that sufficient in academics facilities. As a result, if they were born in faraway islands, they are more chance to lack of study. Secondly, the basic public service, not only the wealthy people are earning tax but it also every people. So the government should develop the public service to support everyone, for instance, public transport in japan that high quality on the top of the world, it is illustrated that the people are more important than to find space. Finally, environmental problems, these days that problem is the main issue to more effectively to the world, for example, deforestation, Greenhouse effect, and reducing of ozone. As a consequence, the government which has the space project should turn around to solve this problem, for example, NASA where the organization is research space project for many decades. If they use that numerous money to solve the environmental problem, it should be helping this problem more than ever. To conclude, despite developed countries having much useful discovery, it is a costly project that money could help more people or environment's world. In my opinion, it is more useful than space exploration.
Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
spend more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to explorer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to decreasing issues of social. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the improvement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is more significant than explorer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
. In my opinion, basic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
service is necessary to humans in every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. I will examine my view in this essay.

First
and foremost, Educational that the children should have identical knowledge, urban city and rural area that the main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
for developing children' knowledge, such as, in Indonesia where the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
has more than 1, 000 islands, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
islands are lack of educating compare with the capital city that sufficient in academics facilities.
As a result
, if they
were born
in faraway islands, they are more chance to lack of study.
Secondly
, the basic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
service, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are earning tax
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
also
every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should develop the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
service to support everyone,
for instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transport in japan that high quality on the top of the world, it
is illustrated
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than to find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
.
Finally
, environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
, these days that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is the main issue to more
effectively
to the world,
for example
, deforestation, Greenhouse effect, and reducing of ozone. As a consequence, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
which has the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
project should turn around to solve this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
,
for example
, NASA where the organization is research
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
project for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
decades. If they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
that numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to solve the environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
, it should be helping this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
more than ever.

To conclude
, despite developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
having much useful discovery, it is a costly project that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
or environment's world. In my opinion, it is more useful than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
exploration.
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IELTS essay Space exploration is a costly project. The money would be much better spend on reducing social problems

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
295 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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