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Some university students prefer to live in on-campus dormitories. Other students prefer to live in apartments off campus. Which would you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Some university students prefer to live in on-campus dormitories. Other students prefer to live in apartments off campus. Which would you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. lx8RD
There are a lot of choices to live as a student, you can live in on-campus dormitories or you can live in apartments off-campus. Both have their advantages. In this essay, I will give my reasons to support my view. On the one side, living in a dormitory has many benefits. First of all, for a foreign student, it is a good chance to improve his or her communication skills and find new friends. Second of all, a dormitory has many useful facilities such as libraries, a canteen, Internet access, etc. In addition to these practical benefits living in a dormitory is often cheaper. So, it helps students save some money what is important at the beginning of their independent life. Finally, living in a dormitory allows students to ask for help from each other if something was not clear in the lecture presented in a class. This, in turn, leads to higher grades. Also, students have many common subjects and interests to discuss with each other. So, living in a dormitory helps students to become more sociable and good team players and gain new knowledge and experience by the use of labs, libraries, and group discussions. On the other side, living in apartments off-campus also has a few benefits. Students can have more privacy and, also, they can choose a community according to its convenience and location. It is sometimes may be essential because of a person's job. Overall I will prefer to live in on-campus dormitories as it is more suitable for me. In conclusion, both on-campus dormitories and apartments have their advantages.
There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
choices to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
, you can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in on-campus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitories
or you can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in apartments off-campus. Both have their advantages. In this essay, I will give my reasons to support my view.

On the one side,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitory
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, for a foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
, it is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
his or her
communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and find new friends. Second of all, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitory
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
useful facilities such as libraries, a canteen, Internet access, etc.
In addition
to these practical benefits
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitory
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
cheaper.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
save
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
money what is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
at the beginning of their independent life.
Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitory
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ask for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
from each other if something was not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
in the lecture presented in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
. This, in turn, leads to higher grades.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
common subjects and interests to discuss with each other.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitory
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to become more sociable and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
team players and gain new knowledge and experience by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of labs, libraries, and group discussions.

On the other side,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in apartments off-campus
also
has a few benefits.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
can have more privacy and,
also
, they can choose a community according to its convenience and location. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
may be essential
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of a person's job.

Overall
I will prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in on-campus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitories
as it is more suitable for me.

In conclusion
, both on-campus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitories
and apartments have their advantages.
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IELTS essay Some university students prefer to live in on-campus dormitories. Other students prefer to live in apartments off campus. Which would you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
265 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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