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Some universities now offer their courses on the Internet so that people can study online. Is this a positive or negative development?

Some universities now offer their courses on the Internet so that people can study online. Is this a positive or negative development? gppL
Children’s development is one the biggest responsibility of every parent living on this planet. But according to some masses, it is argued that, not only family bonding but also other sources such as friends, media and music also plays vital role in child’s development. This essay will discuss about both of these views and will provide a suitable opinion in the end. To commence with, there is no denying fact that kids are always close to their family. Family members can provide guidance to their kids which helps them to understand the importance of many things such as manners, respect to elders, enlightening them what is correct and wrong. Moreover, family members can help their children by being supportive and through this they can built up a good personality and also be accepted in society. On the other side, though parents play a vital role in child’s development, but other factors such as media, companion can also assist to this development. Through media, a variety of good stuffs can learned which creates a positive impact in child’s development. For example, watching interviews of some successful people can create productive mindset in the kid’s development. Secondly, a good surrounding of friends can result in good way of development. By having a quality of friendly group, children can able to do their things by their own such as homework, projects can emerge their progress. In conclusion, children’s development is the toughest job to perform by individuals and in my opinion, I believe that not only family members but also other mediums such as media, friend circles can play a key role in child’s growth.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
is
Did you mean "one of"?
one
the biggest responsibility of every parent living on this planet.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
according to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
masses, it
is argued
that, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
bonding
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
sources such as friends,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
and music
also
plays vital role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
. This essay will
Did you mean simply "discuss both"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discuss about both
of these views and will provide a suitable opinion in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
.

To commence with, there is no denying fact that kids are always close to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Family
members can provide guidance to their kids which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to understand the importance of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things such as manners, respect to elders, enlightening them what is correct and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
by being supportive and through this they can
The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: "build"
built
up a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
personality and
also
be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
in society.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
side, though parents play a vital role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
factors such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
, companion can
also
assist to this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
. Through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
, a variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
stuffs can learned which creates a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
.
For example
, watching interviews of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
successful
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can create productive mindset in the kid’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
.
Secondly
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
surrounding of friends can result in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
. By having a quality of friendly group,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
Please check whether one of these words is redundant.
can able to
do their things by their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
such as homework, projects can emerge their progress.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
is the toughest job to perform by individuals and in my opinion, I believe that not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
mediums such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
, friend circles can play a key role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child’s
growth.
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IELTS essay Some universities now offer their courses on the Internet so that people can study online. Is this a positive or negative development?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
272 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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