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Some think that they want to improve their standard through economic growth , other think that they loss their economic value as a result

Some think that they want to improve their standard through economic growth, other think that they loss their economic value as a result KVa9M
Improving the standard of living based on economic development is going to be popular in the majority of countries, which leads to loss of social values. However, benefits can manage dozen of obstacles for each country leading to economic progress. There are several advantages of having rapid economic growth to fulfil human needs. First, it could increase the consumption of goods and services which is related to utility, with higher consumption levels, there is greater prosperity. Moreover, public services for society would be improved, including health and education. It can be said that the government could provide the highest quality of health care by treating disease and assuring life expectancy. Also, improving the educational standards could contribute to the population a great diversity of skills and literacy. By this means, economic development becomes essential to most countries for welfare and happiness. Nevertheless, every coin has two sides and despite all the advantages of developed economies, there are some disadvantages too. People argue that this could lead to the loss of social values because high economic growth is directly creating injustice among the poor and rich community. This imbalance would partially impact the social discrepancy. Besides, humanity and morality also would be lower since they only depend on materialistic that refer to disrespect to the poor member. For instance, the wealthy community could not have any tolerance to build a relationship, such as helping the poor people as one of the social values too, other than economic aspect. In conclusion, the staple movement of a country as economic value for standard living, including the increment of consumption and public services that are needed by a number of countries, have not more long-run value than humanity and moral aspects. I believe that the benefits of economic growth could merely belong to the rich community, and it is not assuring the poorer inhabitants to have prosperity too.
Improving the standard of living based on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
development is going to be popular in the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, which leads to loss of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
values.
However
, benefits can manage
Use "a dozen" or use a number before 'dozen'.
dozen
of obstacles for each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
leading to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
progress.

There are several advantages of having rapid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
growth to fulfil human needs.
First
, it could increase the consumption of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
and services which
is related
to utility, with higher consumption levels, there is greater prosperity.
Moreover
, public services for society would be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
, including health and education. It can
be said
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
could provide the highest quality of health care by treating disease and assuring life expectancy.
Also
, improving the educational standards could contribute to the population a great diversity of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and literacy. By this means,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
development becomes essential to most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
for welfare and happiness.

Nevertheless
, every coin has two sides and despite all the advantages of developed economies, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages too.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
argue that this could lead to the loss of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
values
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
growth is
directly
creating injustice among the poor and rich community. This imbalance would
partially
impact the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
discrepancy.
Besides
, humanity and morality
also
would be lower since they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
depend on materialistic that refer to disrespect to the poor member.
For instance
, the wealthy community could not have any tolerance to build a relationship, such as helping the poor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
as one of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
values too, other than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
aspect.

In conclusion
, the staple movement of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
for standard living, including the increment of consumption and public services that
are needed
by a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, have not more long-run
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
than humanity and moral aspects. I believe that the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
growth could
merely
belong to the rich community, and it is not assuring the poorer inhabitants to have prosperity too.
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IELTS essay Some think that they want to improve their standard through economic growth, other think that they loss their economic value as a result

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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