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Some think increasing business and cultural contact between nations is positive. Others think it leads to the disappearance of the national identity.

Some think increasing business and cultural contact between nations is positive. Others think it leads to the disappearance of the national identity. K3NJ1
If someone wants to open to their new think, so that person needs take permission of the government, therefore the record could write in the record book. However, others feel that these all think are not recommended. Thus I will write below the paragraphs. Why are these all urgent, New work and new cultural needs registered in government office so that, they can get the new offer to them at any saturation, but it could be such insurance and accidental? For example, if anyone has their own new culture and it did not celebrate and used for should allow of authority. With the factor, another could not get disturbed to take this same as in new open business.
If someone wants to open to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that person needs take permission of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
,
therefore
the record could write in the record book.
However
, others feel that these all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
are not recommended.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
I will write below the paragraphs.

Why are these all urgent,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
New
work and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
cultural needs registered in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
office
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
offer to them at any saturation,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it could be such insurance and accidental?
For example
, if anyone has their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
culture and it did not celebrate and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
of authority. With the factor, another could not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
disturbed to take this same as in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
open business.
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IELTS essay Some think increasing business and cultural contact between nations is positive. Others think it leads to the disappearance of the national identity.

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
118 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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