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Some teachers tend to reward students who achieve high academic results. Others, however, support and reward students that show the most improvement.

Some teachers tend to reward students who achieve high academic results. Others, however, support and reward students that show the most improvement. RWBRG
Teachers hold different views on which type of students deserve recognition and rewards. While some consider high-scoring students to be deserving of praise or incentives, the others believe that students with improving performance are far more worthy of support. However, I personally believe that pupils capable of enhancing academic attainment are equally worthy of recognition. Rewarding students based on academic excellence is for people who prefer a competitive environment. Educational institutes created a system in which they compel students to achieve continued positive results by competing with their colleagues, and in return they obtain monetary gains, public recognition, and teachers’ esteem. For instance, a common practice in East Asian countries is for parents to offer financial incentives to students, educational centers to hand out certificates of excellence, and teachers to highlight individuals for praise. As a result, students are determined to compete against each other to excel at academic performances. Furthermore, this type of system can develop a sense of competitiveness, enhance ambition, and maintain motivation. Professors who prefer students with such qualities tend to consider that higher achievers should be the ones rewarded. However, other teachers favor the catalyst for learning in students with improving performance. Some pupils’ motivations for learning are not high scores and excellent performance, but holistic principles. Therefore, their studying endeavor is, namely, to access the world of knowledge, and to present interest in the subject itself and not the rewards. This type of student may be reluctant to study, or lack motivation occasionally, but the curiosity towards the subject alone can enhance their performance. Moreover, students with these characteristics are known to be self-motivated, quick learners, determined, and persistent once they discover interest in their learning. For this reason, certain professors tend to be in favor of supporting and praising this particular kind of pupil. In conclusion, there has been a controversy among professors who prefer to reward students based on whether they are high achievers or improving academically. However, in my opinion, pupils that improve their performance should be equally rewarded for their efforts as top students.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Teachers
hold
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views on which type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
deserve recognition and rewards. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
consider high-scoring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
The verb 'deserving' is a stative verb and sometimes the progressive form is not correct. Try a simple form instead.
be deserving
of praise or incentives, the others believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
are far more worthy of support.
However
, I
personally
believe that pupils capable of enhancing academic attainment are
equally
worthy of recognition.

Rewarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
based on academic excellence is for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who prefer a competitive environment. Educational institutes created a system in which they compel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to achieve continued
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
results by competing with their colleagues, and in return they obtain monetary gains, public recognition, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers’
esteem.
For instance
, a common practice in East Asian countries is for parents to offer financial incentives to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, educational centers to hand out certificates of excellence, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
to highlight individuals for praise.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are determined
to compete against each other to excel at academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performances
.
Furthermore
, this type of system can develop a sense of competitiveness, enhance ambition, and maintain motivation. Professors who prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with such qualities tend to consider that higher achievers should be the ones rewarded.

However
, other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
favor the catalyst for learning in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
pupils’ motivations for learning are not high scores and excellent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
holistic principles.
Therefore
, their studying endeavor is,
namely
, to access the world of knowledge, and to present interest in the subject itself and not the rewards. This type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
may be reluctant to study, or lack motivation
occasionally
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the curiosity towards the subject alone can enhance their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with these characteristics
are known
to be self-motivated, quick learners, determined, and persistent once they discover interest in their learning.
For this reason
, certain professors tend to be in favor of supporting and praising this particular kind of pupil.

In conclusion
, there has been a controversy among professors who prefer to reward
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
based on whether they are high achievers or improving
academically
.
However
, in my opinion, pupils that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
should be
equally
rewarded for their efforts as top
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.

IELTS essay Some teachers tend to reward students who achieve high academic results. Others, however, support and reward students that show the most improvement.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
344 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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