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Many companies use advertisements to increase their sales. Is advertising a good or bad things for the society?

Many companies use advertisements to increase their sales. Is advertising a good or bad things for the society? 1mGAW
Presently, companies around the globe use advertisement to persuade the society for using their products. This act will help them to enlarge their economy condition and producing their products which in my personal prospective is good. Initially, companies use media commercial such as television to improve their sales by persuading the viewers with high seasonal sales that they decided to have, even the sale is not as exact as they advertised. To illustrate, in Iran, there are some television ads about home accessories such as refrigerator, washing machine, and dish washer. In fact, people will not require the things, but for those who have a new-marriage daughter will be useful. Therefore, these kind of ads will be useful for companies since they persuade some kinds of people that need these products. Furthermore, another method of advertisement which attract buyers is to have famous people for using their products. Since citizens like to have same behavior as celebrities. For instance, LC MAN, a formal dress company that used Amirhossein Arman, a famous Persian actor, in it’s advertise. The commercial was like that a family went to that brand store and the man got confused since he did not know what to buy. Suddenly that actor comes out from the fitting room with beautiful dresses and that man got surprised. The man asked the actor how could you choose this dress and the actor answered let your body to choose. With this advertise that company could sale the products very well and could open three branches in the country. Thus, if you are the boss of the company, this method will help you a lot to sale your products well. To conclude, companies use advertise to persuade citizens that they products are useful for their life with different methods like using a celebrity or having high seasonal sales.
Presently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
around the globe
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
advertisement to persuade the society for using their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. This act will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to enlarge their economy condition and producing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
which in my personal prospective is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
.

Initially
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
media commercial such as television to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
by persuading the viewers with high seasonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
that they decided to have, even the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
is not as exact as they advertised. To illustrate, in Iran, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
television ads about home accessories such as refrigerator, washing machine, and dish washer. In fact,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will not require the things,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
for those who have a new-marriage daughter will be useful.
Therefore
,
Did you mean "this kind" or "these kinds"?
these kind
of ads will be useful for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
since they persuade
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
kinds of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that need these products.

Furthermore
, another method of advertisement which attract buyers is to have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
for using their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. Since citizens like to have same behavior as celebrities.
For instance
, LC
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
MAN
, a formal dress
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
Possible spelling mistake found.
Amirhossein
Possible spelling mistake found.
Arman
, a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
Persian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
actor
, in it’s
The word 'advertise' is a verb. Did you mean the noun "advertisement"?
advertise
. The commercial was like that a family went to that brand store and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
man
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
confused since he did not know what to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
.
Suddenly
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
actor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
out from the fitting room with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
dresses and that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
man
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
surprised. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
man
asked the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
actor
how could you choose this dress and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
actor
answered
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
your body to choose. With this advertise that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
well and could open three branches in the country.
Thus
, if you are the boss of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
, this method will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you a lot to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
well.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
advertise to persuade citizens that they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are useful for their life with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
methods like using a celebrity or having high seasonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
.
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IELTS essay Many companies use advertisements to increase their sales. Is advertising a good or bad things for the society?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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