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Some shops are open 24 hrs a day and seven days a week. It is good thing for costumers, shop staff and company and whole?

Some shops are open 24 hrs a day and seven days a week. It is good thing for costumers, shop staff and company and whole? KyrP3
The development of shop is the historical value in the past. The shops were available in local area which provide groceries, vegetables, fruits, clothes, medicines. People use to buy the different products from respective shops. Today in place of shops the development of supermarkets and commercial shopping malls have provided better services to customer and also benefits to staff and company. To commence with, people think that shops should be open 24 hrs a day and 7 days a week. This concept are applicable to certain things for example, the medical shops should fallow this strategy where as the shops dealing with vegetables and perishable product can not keep it open whole day because the products get spoiled and the shopkeeper suffer. In addition to, there are many reasons providing benefits to the shop’s staff, customer and company. Today, the branded company of clothing such as Raymond, Levi’s these companies established their own premises with the company’s benefits. The staff get the employment and the customer gets the discount and the product surety at the affordable price customer get the branded product. On the other hand, to keep the shop open 24 hrs, this situation is very much important and demanding in medical sector. It has not only given the benefits to patients, doctors but also customers and shops due to this the rule of 7 days a week existed. The local market are given the name according to the days of the week. Such as in my city shukravari bazar(Friday market). And mangal bazar(Tuesday) on this days all the people selling various products are selling the items at reasonable rates to customers which is the traditional marketing strategy. In conclusion, the earlier barter system has develop local market origin into shop and today shopping in very common in supermarket, malls, online shopping which is not only beneficial to customers but also staff and company.
The development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
is the historical value in the past. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
were available in local area which provide groceries, vegetables, fruits, clothes, medicines.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
Make sure that 'use to' is correct. For habitual actions in the past or to mean 'accustomed to', use "used to".
use to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
from respective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
in place of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
the development of supermarkets and commercial shopping malls have provided better services to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
and
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefits
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staff
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

To commence with,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
should be open 24 hrs a day and 7 days a week.
The verb 'are' is plural. Did you mean: "This concept is"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
This concept are
applicable to certain things
for example
, the medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
should fallow this strategy
Did you mean "whereas"?
where as
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
dealing with vegetables and perishable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
it open whole day
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
spoiled and the shopkeeper suffer.
In addition
to, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefits
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staff
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
, the branded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
of clothing such as Raymond, Levi’s these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
established their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
premises with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefits
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staff
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the employment and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
the discount and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
surety at the affordable price
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the branded product.

On the other hand
, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
open 24 hrs, this situation is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and demanding in medical sector. It has not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefits
to patients, doctors
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
due to this the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
of 7 days a week existed. The local market are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the name according to the days of the week. Such as in my city
Possible spelling mistake found.
shukravari
Possible spelling mistake found.
bazar
(Friday market). And
Possible spelling mistake found.
mangal
Possible spelling mistake found.
bazar
(Tuesday) on
It seems that a possessive apostrophe is missing.
this days
all the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
selling various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are selling the items at reasonable rates to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
which is the traditional marketing strategy.

In conclusion
, the earlier barter system has
Use past participle here: "developed".
develop
local market origin into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
shopping in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
common in supermarket, malls, online shopping which is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
beneficial to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staff
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
.
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IELTS essay Some shops are open 24 hrs a day and seven days a week. It is good thing for costumers, shop staff and company and whole?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
315 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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