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Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects especially at the primary level? Do you agree or disagree?

Some people assign an importance to music, art and drama as a part of school curriculum. Moreover, they emphasize the significance of them at the primary level. I agree with the statement that these subjects are indespensible in learning process. First of all, it is impossible to deny that music and art are conducive to creating the favorable atmosphere of creativity over the course of obtaining education, because these lessons can be organized in less formal manner than other academical disciplines. Therefore, they allow to expand creative potencial, help children to combat their fear of public perfomance, serve as emollient to children having problems with following formal standards during their study. Secondly, engaging in such a subject implies acquaring meaningful fact about prominent musicians, composers, artists and writers. As a consequence, conveying information about their path to creating magnificent masterpieces, teacher provides impressive examples which fascinate children, kindle their interest to composing and painting. By virtue of it, students commence to draw inspiration from the school lessons and generally become more passionate about learning. In conclusion, studying art, music and drama bear crucial significance due to immense spectrum of benefits students can yield from these lessons. These positive effects encompass increasing creativity in young generation and supporting their motivation in perfoming tasks.
Some
people
assign an importance to music, art and drama as a part of school curriculum.
Moreover
, they emphasize the significance of them at the primary level. I
agree
with the statement that these subjects are
indespensible
in learning process.

First of all
, it is impossible to deny that music and art are conducive to creating the favorable atmosphere of creativity over the course of obtaining education,
because
these lessons can
be organized
in less formal manner than other academical disciplines.
Therefore
, they
allow
to expand
creative
potencial
,
help
children to combat their fear of public
perfomance
, serve as emollient to children having problems with following formal standards during their study.

Secondly
, engaging in such a subject implies
acquaring
meaningful fact about prominent musicians, composers, artists and writers. As a consequence, conveying information about their path to creating magnificent masterpieces, teacher provides impressive examples which fascinate children, kindle their interest to composing and painting. By virtue of it, students commence to draw inspiration from the school lessons and
generally
become more passionate about learning.

In conclusion
, studying art, music and drama bear crucial significance due to immense spectrum of benefits students can yield from these lessons. These
positive
effects encompass increasing creativity in young generation and supporting their motivation in
perfoming
tasks.
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IELTS essay Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects especially at the primary level?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
212 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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