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Some people work on the same type of work for their whole lives while others prefer to change their work type. Which of the approaches is more reasonable in your opinion?

Some people work on the same type of work for their whole lives while others prefer to change their work type. Which of the approaches is more reasonable in your opinion? r8awk
A considerable number of people assert that working at the same sphere during one’s lifetime is the option everyone should stick to. Others, on the other hand, hold adamantly to the opposing view, claiming that switching between various types of jobs can be a much better option. As far as I am concerned, the former holds merit. Thus, I take this view on account for the reasons analyzed below. One reason why I am fundamentally in accord with the former viewpoint is that the only way to become a professional in any sphere is to dedicate a sufficient amount of time and effort into it. However, this is almost impossible to achieve if an individual is unwilling to focus his attention on the given sphere and considering changing his career in the near future. A type of example that immediately comes to mind has to do with a scientist, specialising in a complicated sphere of knowledge such as cellular microbiology. Before conducting any significant study, the scientist has to become an expert in the field, which can sometimes take more than a decade of diligent work. Thus, if someone decides to switch his career to this sphere, he will have to spend no less than a number of years to obtain all the required knowledge, which would definitely be way too long for the overwhelming majority of people. To add further credence to my assertion I note that dramatically changing the career path can raise numerous financial issues. It is a well-known fact that obtaining new skills and getting new education not only require plenty of time and energy, but also large sums of money. Tuition fees in the universities skyrocket nowadays, and only wealthy people can afford to pay for getting a second degree. In contrast, by choosing only one field and improving the relevant skills one can ensure financial stability and gradual rise in the salary as an individual further develops his skills and climbs the career ladder. All in all, I am of adamant view that performing the same type of job is the best possible option one could choose. I take this view on account in a fit of the fact that it not only a perfect way to become proficient in the sphere you work in, but could also ensure better career prospects and financial stability.
A considerable number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
assert that working at the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sphere
during one’s lifetime is the option everyone should stick to. Others,
on the other hand
, hold
adamantly
to the opposing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
view
, claiming that switching between various types of jobs can be a much better option. As far as I
am concerned
, the former holds merit.
Thus
, I take this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
view
on account for the reasons analyzed below.

One reason why I am
fundamentally
in accord with the former viewpoint is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
way to become a professional in any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sphere
is to dedicate a sufficient amount of time and effort into it.
However
, this is almost impossible to achieve if an individual is unwilling to focus his attention on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sphere
and considering changing his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
in the near future. A type of example that immediately
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to mind
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
do with a scientist,
Possible spelling mistake. 'specialising' is British English.
specialising
in a complicated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sphere
of knowledge such as cellular microbiology.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Before
conducting any significant study, the scientist
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
become an expert in the field, which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
take more than a decade of diligent work.
Thus
, if someone decides to switch his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
to this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sphere
, he will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend no less than a number of years to obtain all the required knowledge, which would definitely be way too long for the overwhelming majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
further
credence to my assertion I note that
dramatically
changing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
path can raise numerous financial issues.
It is a well-known fact that
obtaining new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and getting new education not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
require
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of time and energy,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
large sums of money. Tuition fees in the universities skyrocket nowadays, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
wealthy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can afford to pay for getting a second degree.
In contrast
, by choosing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
one field and improving the relevant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
one can ensure financial stability and gradual rise in the salary as an individual
further
develops his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and climbs the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
ladder.

All in all, I am of adamant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
view
that performing the same type of job is the best possible option one could choose. I take this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
view
on account in a fit of the fact that it not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
a perfect way to become proficient in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sphere
you work in,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
could
also
ensure better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
prospects and financial stability.
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IELTS essay Some people work on the same type of work for their whole lives while others prefer to change their work type. Which of the approaches is more reasonable in your opinion?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
391 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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