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Some people thought that the salaries should be on limit and some think it should be given properly .discuss both views and tell ur opinion

Some people thought that the salaries should be on limit and some think it should be given properly. discuss both views and tell ur opinion PVdw2
In the contemporary world, there is the partiality between the wages of employees in some jobs whereas they are given properly at some workplaces. Income should be limited by government related to jobs but I partially disagree with this statement as want to discuss both the views in the upcoming paragraphs. Revenues should not be lessen by the government authorities as it meet the needs of our basic requirements with relation to medical care, Education and more. Even, if the revenues will be shrinked by government policies in the case of career, we can't help the underprivileged classes of our society. In addition to this, it will not encourage the dedicated and diligent employees to work hard and made contribution towards their firms, society and nation as well. Moreover, the overall productivity of the country declined which will allow offender activities to take place in the community. For instance, the violence and conflict cases will rise between the different classes of people if some deprived of the precise wages that they want due to their skills. On the other hand, government organisations should cap the salaries to demolish the huge differences between various working counterparts. There are plethora of reasons to take this step. First and foremost reason is Dedication that can only be carried through positive employees who really do hardwork to prosper their status and enterprises. Thus, other person took a knowledge through him and want to be identical. Secondly, the privileged and underprivileged societies will get the same respect in private places(hospitals, schools). Thirdly, globalisation problem will be declined if all castes without any difference will get the jobs here. For instance, many classes specially general classes that is jaat communities travel to foreign because of huge income disparities occuring in our country specially, India. To sum up, salaries should be given on the balanced basis related to the skills of people so that no mind get disrupted by income differences.
In the contemporary world, there is the partiality between the wages of employees in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
jobs whereas they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
properly
at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
workplaces. Income should
be limited
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
related to jobs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
partially
disagree with this statement as want to discuss both the views in the upcoming paragraphs. Revenues should not be
Consider using a past participle here: "lessened".
lessen
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
authorities as it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the needs of our basic requirements with relation to medical care, Education and more. Even, if the revenues will be
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "shrank", the past tense form of the verb 'shrink'?
shrinked
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
policies in the case of career, we can't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the underprivileged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
of our society.
In addition
to this, it will not encourage the dedicated and diligent employees to work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
and made contribution towards their firms, society and nation
as well
.
Moreover
, the
overall
productivity of the country declined which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
offender activities to take place in the community.
For instance
, the violence and conflict cases will rise between the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
if
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
deprived of the precise wages that they want due to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
should cap the salaries to demolish the huge differences between various working counterparts. There are plethora of reasons to take this step.
First
and foremost reason is Dedication that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be carried
through
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
employees who
really
do
Possible spelling mistake found.
hardwork
to prosper their status and enterprises.
Thus
, other person took
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "knowledge".
a knowledge
through him and want to be identical.
Secondly
, the privileged and underprivileged societies will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the same respect in private places(hospitals, schools).
Thirdly
,
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
problem will
be declined
if all castes without any difference will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the jobs here.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
specially
general
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
that is
Possible spelling mistake found.
jaat
communities travel to foreign
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of huge income disparities
Possible spelling mistake found.
occuring
in our country
specially
, India. To sum up, salaries should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
on the balanced basis related to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that no mind
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
disrupted by income differences.
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IELTS essay Some people thought that the salaries should be on limit and some think it should be given properly. discuss both views and tell ur opinion

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
324 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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