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Some people think younger leaders would be better. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think younger leaders would be better. 56lYm
In recent years, choosing a leadership position in a company or an organization is extremely important. In my opinion, the younger people who are suitable for applying for leadership positions. The argument in favour of appointing older leaders would be that they accumulated considerable specialized knowledge and practical experience through years of working, they can make better decisions, which means that the experience of older leaders can be a crucial element that helps them maintain the growth of the company or an organization. However, this might be a shortsighted view. Although younger leaders have less experience than old leaders, they are more conducive to access new knowledge which helps them outperform old leaders. Therefore, the CEO of companies should appoint younger individuals for positions that demand leadership skills for their updated knowledge. Younger leaders would be the best choice for most companies as they are stronger and creativity. Since the younger people will have creative ideas and innovative perspectives, which were often lacking in older leaders, could significantly contribute to the development of the company, especially in some cases being of vital importance. For example, Steve Jobs took Apple from near bankruptcy to the world’s most admired tech company by his brilliant designs when he was still very young. Moreover, younger leaders are physically stronger, so they could shoulder great responsibility and withstand the pressure can come from heavy workload better than old ones. With stiffer competition, leaders have to under intense pressure from their work and the ability of elderly leaders will be limited due to health-related problems. In conclusion, leadership positions should be given to younger people.
In recent years, choosing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leadership
position in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
or an organization is
extremely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. In my opinion, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are suitable for applying for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leadership
positions.

The argument in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of appointing older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
would be that they accumulated considerable specialized knowledge and practical experience through years of working, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
better decisions, which means that the experience of older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
can be a crucial element that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them maintain the growth of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
or an organization.
However
, this might be a shortsighted view. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
have less experience than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
, they are more conducive to access new knowledge which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them outperform
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
.
Therefore
, the CEO of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
should appoint
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
individuals for positions that demand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leadership
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
for their updated knowledge.

Younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
would be the best choice for most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
as they are stronger and creativity. Since the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will have creative
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and innovative perspectives, which were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
lacking in older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
, could
significantly
contribute to the development of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
,
especially
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases being of vital importance.
For example
, Steve Jobs took Apple from near bankruptcy to the world’s most admired tech
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
by his brilliant designs when he was
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
young.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
are
physically
stronger,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they could shoulder great responsibility and withstand the pressure can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from heavy workload better than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
ones. With stiffer competition,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
under intense pressure from their work and the ability of elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
will
be limited
due to health-related problems.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leadership
positions should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
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IELTS essay Some people think younger leaders would be better.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
269 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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