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Some people think the internet provides people with a lot of valuable information; others think it creates problems. Which view do you agree with? Why?

Some people think the internet provides people with a lot of valuable information; others think it creates problems. Which view do you agree with? Why? 0aNq9
Some humans think the internet supply people with a lot of valuable information. while, others think too much information creates problems. I accord with the internet provides with a lot of valuable information. I describe with main ideas, explain and example. Firstly, by using internet can find out essential and important information which we want. We can get information fast and easily by filtering which we needed information. My own experience is a compelling example this. When I was doing undergraduate research I had to find many information about my research. I found and refer lots of journals, documents and book by using internet. Also I watched many videos and visually get some knowledge about which I need. Its very helpful to remember things. I found all the information in using laptop and I don't need to go and refer the books in libraries. So Collecting valuable information by internet is more easier and fast than other ways. Secondly, we can collect the newly updated precious information using by internet. Because day by day always updating and feed new information to cloud servers. We can collect valuable data which who have responsibilities such as authors, journals and books. Some times we can contact them through internet and clarify our doubts. Also we can exchange our knowledge through internet. For instance, I had to do some assignment in my one of the lecture. So I go and refer the book in library and wrote assignment. After given for marking I got less mark. Then I asked professor about the reason for getting low marks. He told I wrote outdated information in my assignment. If I refer the journal through internet I will meet updated and old information both. Also, I got valuable information for my one of next assignment by mailing to instructor. In conclusion, I strongly believe that using internet and getting valuable information by internet is more important. This is because we can find easy, fast, updated valuable and essential information.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
humans
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the internet supply
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
valuable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
while
, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
too much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
creates problems. I accord with the internet provides with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
valuable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
with main
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
and example.

Firstly
, by using internet can find out essential and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
which we want. We can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
and
easily
by filtering which we needed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
. My
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
experience is a compelling example this.
“When” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
When
I was doing undergraduate research I had to find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
about my research. I found and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
refer
lots of journals, documents and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
by using internet.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
videos and
visually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
knowledge about which I need. Its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
helpful to remember things. I found all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
in using laptop and I don't need to go and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
refer
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
in libraries.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
Collecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
valuable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
by internet is
Use only "easier" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more easier
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
than other ways.

Secondly
, we can collect the
newly
updated precious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
using by internet.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
day by day always updating and feed new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
to cloud servers. We can collect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
valuable
data which who have responsibilities such as authors, journals and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
times we can contact them through internet and clarify our doubts.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
we can exchange our knowledge through internet.
For instance
, I had to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
assignment
in my one of the lecture.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I go and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
refer
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
in library and wrote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
assignment
. After
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
for marking I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
less mark. Then I asked professor about the reason for getting low marks. He
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
I wrote outdated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
assignment
. If I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
refer
the journal through internet I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
updated and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
both.
Also
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
valuable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
for my one of
next
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
assignment
by mailing to instructor.

In conclusion
, I
strongly
believe that using internet and getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
valuable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
by internet is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
we can find easy,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
, updated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
valuable
and essential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
.
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IELTS essay Some people think the internet provides people with a lot of valuable information; others think it creates problems. Which view do you agree with? Why?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
332 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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