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Some people think the best way to stay fit is joining a gym health club while others think doing everyday activities such as walking and climbing stairs is sufficient Discuss both the views with your opinion v.2

Some people think the best way to stay fit is joining a gym health club while others think doing everyday activities such as walking and climbing stairs is sufficient 2
It is believed by some people that the challenging subjects like mathematics and philosophy which are found to be difficult by the children should be made optional instead of compulsory in the school curriculum. However, in my view, the basic understanding of both these topics should be required by everyone to flourish in their lives. First and foremost, mathematics is a subject which deals with calculative and analytic skill development of the brain. Even later on in the life, it is necessary to do the basic calculations related to daily activities and in handling their earned finances. Secondly, philosophy teaches moral values, ethics and principles which all are mandatory to develop the interpersonal soft skills. These behavioural core values will help a person to maintain balance between professional and personal aspects. Hence, teachers should use some tailored approach with the help of modern technology to teach their students in a more understandable and interactive ways. Moreover, teaching should not be focused alone on the strengths of the child instead efforts should be made to improve the weaknesses of the student. In fact, presenting children to a vast range of fields can be useful to them for learning complex topics later in the life. For instance, to hold a good understanding of an economy, one must be have a basic understanding of mathematics and history. To recapitulate, I opine that schools should not be the place where the focus should be alone on the strengths of child by narrowing the range of subjects as per child’s preferences. In view of it, the school should develop strong fundamental base by making some basic topics like mathematics and philosophy compulsory in their curriculum for the growth of the well rounded individual.
It
is believed
by
some
people
that the challenging subjects like
mathematics
and philosophy which
are found
to be difficult by the children should
be made
optional
instead
of compulsory in the school curriculum.
However
, in my view, the
basic
understanding of both these topics should
be required
by everyone to flourish in their
lives
.

First
and foremost,
mathematics
is a subject which deals with calculative and analytic
skill
development of the brain. Even later on in the life, it is necessary to do the
basic
calculations related to daily activities and in handling their earned finances.
Secondly
, philosophy teaches moral values, ethics and principles which all are mandatory to develop the interpersonal soft
skills
. These
behavioural
core values will
help
a person to maintain balance between professional and personal aspects.
Hence
, teachers should
use
some
tailored approach with the
help
of modern technology to teach their students in a more understandable and interactive ways.

Moreover
, teaching should not
be focused
alone on the strengths of the child
instead
efforts should
be made
to
improve
the weaknesses of the student. In fact, presenting children to a vast range of fields can be useful to them for learning complex topics later in the life.
For instance
, to hold a
good
understanding of an economy, one
must
be
have
a
basic
understanding of
mathematics
and history.

To recapitulate, I opine that schools should not be the place where the focus should be alone on the strengths of child by narrowing the range of subjects as per child’s preferences. In view of it, the school should develop strong fundamental base by making
some
basic
topics like
mathematics
and philosophy compulsory in their curriculum for the growth of the
well rounded
individual.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think the best way to stay fit is joining a gym health club while others think doing everyday activities such as walking and climbing stairs is sufficient 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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