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Some people think that they can go to gym to remain fit, while others think that there aa better ways to do this. Discuss both of views along with your opinion

Some People think the best way to stay fit is by joining a gym/health club while others think doing everyday activities such as walking and climbing stairs is sufficient. v. 2
Health has played an important role in our life. With passage of time there has been drastic change in our lifestyle which has affected our health mostly in adverse way. In order to maintain our body in healthy position, it is important to do some exercise irrespective of matter whether we do it in gym or at home From ancient times people know that healthy mind resides in a healthy body and due to lack of technology and innovation people usually perform excercise at home. It helped them to keep thier energy level high and helping thier body to perform well ultimately granting them a long life but on the contrary side, due to innovation and passage of time most of people now do not have time to perform excercise due to thier busy life and hectic schedule which results in poor health As we know that we have to do yoga and some other excercise to keep our body fit. But most of the time we find it boring after some time amd lack interest. Moreover our mindset is very much important as nothing can be achieved without determination. We have to mend our habits and also ensure that we maintain our daily routine in such a way that excercise time is also intacted in it. It doesn't matter that we perform excercise at home or at gym but having a fixed time for excercise and performing the same time is very much important To conclude we can say that it depends on us how we maintain our daily schedule which will decide that whether we will live a healthy life or not. To live a healthy life a perfect mindset and fixed time for excercise is needed irrespective of place where we are using it
Health has played an
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important
role in our
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life
. With passage of
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time
there has been drastic
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change
in our lifestyle which has
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affected
our health
mostly
in adverse way. In order to maintain our
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body
in
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healthy
position, it is
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important
to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
exercise irrespective of matter whether we do it in gym or at home

From ancient
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times
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
know that
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healthy
mind resides in a
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healthy
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body
and due to lack of technology and innovation
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people
usually
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perform
Possible spelling mistake found.
excercise
at home. It
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helped
them to
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keep
Possible spelling mistake found.
thier
energy level high and helping
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thier
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body
to
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perform
well
ultimately
granting them a long
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life
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but
on the contrary
side, due to innovation and passage of
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time
most of
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people
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now
do not have
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time
to
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perform
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excercise
due to
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thier
busy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and hectic schedule which results in poor
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
health


As we know that we
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have to
do yoga and
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some
other
Possible spelling mistake found.
excercise
to
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keep
our
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body
fit.
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But
most of the
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time
we find it boring after
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some
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time
Possible spelling mistake found.
amd
lack interest.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
our mindset is
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very
much
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
as nothing can
be achieved
without determination. We
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
mend our habits and
also
ensure that we maintain our daily routine in such a way that
Possible spelling mistake found.
excercise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
is
also
Possible spelling mistake found.
intacted
in it. It doesn't matter that we
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perform
Possible spelling mistake found.
excercise
at home or at gym
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but
having a
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fixed
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time
for
Possible spelling mistake found.
excercise
and performing the same
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time
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
important


To conclude
we can say that it depends on us how we maintain our daily schedule which will decide that whether we will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
or not. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
a perfect mindset and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for
Possible spelling mistake found.
excercise
is needed
irrespective of place where we are using
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
it
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IELTS essay Some people think that they can go to gym to remain fit, while others think that there aa better ways to do this. Discuss both of views along with your opinion

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
296 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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