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Some people think that when a person travels into a different culture they should adapt to the local practices and customs. To what extent do you agree?

Some people think that when a person travels into a different culture they should adapt to the local practices and customs. OOek
It is believed by some individuals that when people travels to other nations they can adapt the local culture of that country, while, other reject this notion. However, i personally assert that it is not bad for a person to acquire new custom, they should also preserve their own culture. There are number of reasons why people should keep their own culture. The first prominent reason is that, native practice is the prior identity to the person which have given by their great grandparents or ancestors so they should adopt their own cultural activates instead of other countries’ customs. Another striking reason is that, it is not only good for young generation but it will have also great impact on future generation. Therefore, it is obligatory for the intellectuals to give priority to their own culture. For instance, India is diverse nation where people belongs to different cast and creed but they always prefer to their cultural activities according to their religious methodology. On the other hand, it is argued that a person can get other nation's culture while visiting there. First and foremost reason is that, by following another culture person can broaden their horizon as they can observe different traditions as well. Secondly, discriminations will be diminished if people will understand the value of all customs. To exemplify this, many tourists visits in Golden Temple Amritsar on special occasion tend to enhance their knowledge about other practice and custom. By doing this, they can interact with other person could share their feelings with them towards culture. In conclusion, to some extent, it is good way to adopt other culture, it is the first right to follow own practice and customs.
It
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals that when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
travels
to
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other
nations they can adapt the local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
of that country, while,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
reject this notion.
However
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
personally
assert that it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
to acquire new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
custom
, they should
also
preserve their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
culture.

There are number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
. The
first
prominent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that, native practice is the prior identity to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
which have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by their great grandparents or ancestors
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they should adopt their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
cultural activates
instead
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
countries’ customs. Another striking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that, it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for young generation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it will have
also
great impact on future generation.
Therefore
, it is obligatory for the intellectuals to give priority to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
.
For instance
, India
Please check whether an article is missing: "is a diverse" or "is an diverse"
is diverse
nation where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
belongs
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cast and creed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they always prefer to their cultural activities according to their religious methodology.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, it
is argued
that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
nation's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
while visiting there.
First
and foremost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that, by following another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
can broaden their horizon as they can observe
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
traditions
as well
.
Secondly
, discriminations will
be diminished
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will understand the value of all customs. To exemplify this,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
tourists visits in Golden Temple Amritsar on special occasion tend to enhance their knowledge about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
practice and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
custom
. By doing this, they can interact with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
could share their feelings with them towards culture.

In conclusion
, to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent, it is
Please check whether an article is missing: "a good".
good
way to adopt
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
, it is the
first
right to follow
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
practice and customs.
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IELTS essay Some people think that when a person travels into a different culture they should adapt to the local practices and customs.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
282 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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