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Some people think that watching sports in one’s free time is just waste of time. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? v.3

Some people think that watching sports in one’s free time is just waste of time. v. 3
Some people hold the opinion that it is such a waste of free time to watch sport. I disagree with this view. In my opinion, watching sports can enhance bonding within communities and promote a healthier lifestyle among individuals. Watching sport on television or from the gallery is an opportunity for people to come together and cheer for their team. Fans watching the game together may have different status in life and they may endorse different religious beliefs or political ideologies. However, when they watch the game, they have only one concern in the world and that is to see their team emerge victorious. Obviously, sporting events bring people closer and help them forget their differences. When their team wins an international match, it is celebration time for all of them. Sports even ignite patriotic feelings in people. Community bonding is not the only benefit of watching sports. When people watch their favourite sportspersons in action, they feel encouraged to stay fit and live a healthier life. Teenagers, in particular, adore sporting heroes and want to emulate their lifestyle. Needless to say, people who watch sports matches regularly tend to live physically active lives. They are also healthier. For example, a recent study showed that there was a 30% increase in gym memberships during the recently held World Cup Football championship. By contrast, watching other television shows or engaging in other activities during free time does not produce this effect. This is because the content is less inspiring and it does not motivate people to change their lifestyle. Thus, it is evident that watching sports in free time motivates people to engage in physical activity and live healthier lives. To conclude, watching sports is not a waste of time. It promotes stronger bonding within communities and leaves a positive impact on people by encouraging them to pursue a healthy way of life.
Some
people
hold the opinion that it is such a waste of free
time
to
watch
sport
. I disagree with this view. In my opinion, watching
sports
can enhance bonding within communities and promote a healthier lifestyle among individuals.

Watching
sport
on television or from the gallery is an opportunity for
people
to
come
together and cheer for their team. Fans watching the game together may have
different
status in
life and
they may endorse
different
religious beliefs or political ideologies.
However
, when they
watch
the game, they have
only
one concern in the world and
that is
to
see
their team emerge victorious.
Obviously
, sporting
events
bring
people
closer and
help
them forget their differences. When their team wins an international match, it is celebration
time
for all of them.
Sports
even ignite patriotic feelings in
people
.

Community bonding is not the
only
benefit of watching
sports
. When
people
watch
their
favourite
sportspersons
in action, they feel encouraged to stay fit and
live
a healthier life.
Teenagers
,
in particular
, adore sporting heroes and want to emulate their lifestyle. Needless to say,
people
who
watch
sports
matches
regularly
tend to
live
physically
active
lives
. They are
also
healthier.
For example
, a recent study
showed
that there was a 30% increase in gym memberships during the recently held World Cup Football championship. By contrast, watching other television
shows
or engaging in other activities during free
time
does not produce this effect. This is
because
the content is less inspiring and it does not motivate
people
to
change
their lifestyle.
Thus
, it is evident that watching
sports
in free
time
motivates
people
to engage in physical activity and
live
healthier
lives
.

To conclude
, watching
sports
is not a waste of
time
. It promotes stronger bonding within communities and
leaves
a
positive
impact on
people
by encouraging them to pursue a healthy way of life.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
29Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that watching sports in one’s free time is just waste of time. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
312 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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