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Some people think that video games are really bad and should be completely banned. Other people, however, think that video games are all good and people should be encouraged to play them, especially children and teenagers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that video games are really bad and should be completely banned. Other people, however, think that video games are all good and people should be encouraged to play them, especially children and teenagers. Yy0OV
It seems to many people that playing games always causes negative consequences to the users and we should prohibit this entertainment to prevent disadvantages. However, others would say this makes their life much better. While the former view can be justified for some reasons, I am more inclined toward the latter. Honestly, I can understand why people still have bad assumptions on video games as much as so much that they find this should be banned. First of all, like other entertaining activities, participants need to spend certain hours on gaming. So this leads to the opinion that joining in games can waste one’s time which they can use for other meaningful work. Then, if gamers continue playing too much, they will easily be addicted to this hobby without their awareness. Every issue will be more pressing when people become obsessives. However, I personally believe that those thoughts still have their vulnerabilities. In fact, gaming brings a host of advantages, which not only for players but also for society. Therefore, other people lean toward the second view which agrees with encouragement to play games. And to my knowledge, we all need happiness and relaxation to balance our tricky life, don’t we? Because we are living, not existing, I think finding ways to success should accompany finding our true pleasures. Frankly speaking, as an entertainment, playing games still has a specific impact on the mental health of gamers, who are usually big on video games. This is obviously because they are doing what they love. Additionally, I extremely believe that having our own joys in human life is a must. Moreover, it does not have to be the same because of the diversity which is also a factor that creates different stories, different colors in society. To me, entertainment is not wrong, especially gaming is not wrong, it depends on the way people use it. Everyone should be respected, everyone’s hobbies also need the same respect. Because playing video games is not a crime, I believe that prohibiting it is not a smart solution at all. In conclusion, while gaming is not without certain drawbacks, I would say that it is not that bad and people should be encouraged to play them if they want to. However, it is also crucial that gamers should know ways to control their life and games.
It seems to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
always causes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
The usual preposition to use after "consequences" is not "to". Did you mean "consequences of", "consequences for", or "consequences on"?
consequences to
the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
users and
we should prohibit this entertainment to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
disadvantages.
However
, others would say this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
better. While the former view can
be justified
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons, I am more inclined toward the latter.

Honestly
, I can understand why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
still
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
assumptions on video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
that they find this should
be banned
.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
entertaining activities, participants need to spend certain hours on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gaming
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
this leads to the opinion that joining in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
can waste one’s time which they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
meaningful work. Then, if gamers continue
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
too
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
, they will
easily
be addicted
to this hobby without their awareness. Every issue will be more pressing when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
become obsessives.
However
, I
personally
believe that those thoughts
still
have their vulnerabilities.

In fact,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gaming
brings a host of advantages, which not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for players
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
for society.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
lean toward the second view which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with encouragement to play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. And to my knowledge, we all need happiness and relaxation to balance our tricky
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, don’t we?
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
we are living, not existing, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
finding ways to success should accompany finding our true pleasures.
Frankly
speaking, as an entertainment,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
still
has a specific impact on the mental health of gamers, who are
usually
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
on video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. This is
obviously
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are doing what they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
.
Additionally
, I
extremely
believe that having our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
joys in human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
.
Moreover
, it does not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be the same
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the diversity which is
also
a factor that creates
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
stories,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
colors in society. To me, entertainment is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
,
especially
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gaming
is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
, it depends on the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it. Everyone should
be respected
, everyone’s hobbies
also
need the same respect.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
is not a crime, I believe that prohibiting it is not a smart solution at all.

In conclusion
, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gaming
is not without certain drawbacks, I would say that it is not that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
be encouraged
to play them if they want to.
However
, it is
also
crucial that gamers should know ways to control their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
.

IELTS essay Some people think that video games are really bad and should be completely banned. Other people, however, think that video games are all good and people should be encouraged to play them, especially children and teenagers.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
391 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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  • Some people think that video games are really bad and should be completely banned. Other people, however, think that video games are all good and people should be encouraged to play them, especially children and teenagers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.