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Some people think that there should be an age limit to access the social media. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that there should be an age limit to access the social media. jDEqX
These is no denail that social media is indispensable part of human life as it provides access to wide range of people. However, over access to such medium result in abusemed hence, many keeps a perception to have age restriction to this Meanwhile, the following essay with agruement with the uforementioned notion and the reasons to support with relevant examples will be illustrated in the forthcoming paragraphs. TO commence with; although, there are multifurious reason behind this phenomenon first and foremost is that lake of maturity to oprate social media. To elaborate it, if children use more social media, they receive the knowledge about all over the world and they are not enough mature to understand what is good and bad, so they can go to wrong way. For example, In japan child know about the latest social media activity of anything in small age and It can enhance their bad habits such as smoking, drinking, taking drugs, gambling. Hence, social media is very harmful for kids. Another prime reason is that diversion of their mental health. To be precise with, if they spend their most of time on social media, it is not only dangerous for their mental health but also for their physical health. A part from this it is directly affects on their education and can impair a child's academic achievement. Take an example, according to the USA which they discussed about this topic few years ago, there are teenagers who more active on social platform they can not focus on their studies because they give more importance to such activities rather than study so, they get low score in their results. Hence, it can destroy school their life. on the other factor. cannot avoided if the authorities restrict age, children will be deprived of a wide range of knowledge. To justify it, if age criteria is there, they can not to know about the new reserch such as, space, latest gadgets and so farth and knowledge about new tochnology is very beneficial for teenagers. For example, student know about the latest discoveries of anything in social media and it is helpful for improve their unacademic knowledge. To conclude, it is true that social media platform provide latest information around the globe, but my auguements prove that it is dengours for health, so age bar is the appropriate way to deal with the situation.
The verb 'is' is singular. Did you mean: "This is" or "These am", "These are", "These aren"?
These is
no
Possible spelling mistake found.
denail
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is indispensable part of human life as it provides access to wide range of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
However
, over access to such medium result in
Possible spelling mistake found.
abusemed
hence
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
a perception to have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
restriction to this Meanwhile, the following essay with
Possible spelling mistake found.
agruement
with the
Possible spelling mistake found.
uforementioned
notion and the reasons to support with relevant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
examples
will
be illustrated
in the forthcoming paragraphs. TO commence with; although, there are
Possible spelling mistake found.
multifurious
reason behind this phenomenon
first
and foremost is that lake of maturity to
Possible spelling mistake found.
oprate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
. To elaborate it, if children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
, they receive the knowledge about all over the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
world and
they are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
mature to understand what is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can go to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
way. For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
example
, In japan child know about the latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
activity of anything in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
and It can enhance their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
habits such as smoking, drinking, taking drugs, gambling.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
harmful for kids. Another prime reason is that diversion of their mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
. To be precise with, if they spend their
Consider using "most time" or "most of the time".
most of time
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
, it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
for their mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
for their physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
. A part from this it is
directly
affects on their education and can impair a child's academic achievement. Take an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
example
, according to the USA which they
Did you mean simply "discussed this"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discussed about this
topic few years ago, there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
who more active on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
platform they can not focus on their studies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they give more importance to such activities
rather
than study
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
low score in their results.
Hence
, it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
school their life.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
on
the other factor.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
cannot
The verb 'cannot' requires the base form of the verb: "avoid"
avoided
if the authorities restrict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
, children will
be deprived
of a wide range of knowledge. To justify it, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
criteria is there, they can not to know about the new
Possible spelling mistake found.
reserch
such as, space,
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
gadgets and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
Possible spelling mistake found.
farth
and knowledge about new
Possible spelling mistake found.
tochnology
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
beneficial for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
. For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
example
, student know about the latest discoveries of anything in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
and it is helpful for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their
Possible spelling mistake found.
unacademic
knowledge.

To conclude
, it is true that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
platform provide
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
information around the globe,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
my
Possible spelling mistake found.
auguements
prove that it is
Possible spelling mistake found.
dengours
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
bar is the appropriate way to deal with the situation.
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IELTS essay Some people think that there should be an age limit to access the social media.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
397 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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