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Some people believed that in order to have peaceful life we should restore death penalty. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believed that in order to have peaceful life we should restore death penalty. BLdrj
It is generally considered that corporal punishment has to be enacted in order to secure safety in society. I do consider that some criminals definitely deserve being sentenced to death. First of all, people who threaten the peace of society with their malicious attitudes towards children and innocent people must be harshly sentenced. It is irrefutable that, innumerable children have been molesting sexually by perverts in different places of the world. Children being subjected to sexual harassment suffer from it both physically and psychologically as result most of them resort to suicide to relieve this trauma. Moreover, not only does it afflict raped people, but it also takes its heavy toll on their family and friends. The rehabilitation of these villains is out of question and being sentenced to corporal punishment serves their right. Secondly, taking care of some criminals is a financial burden for the government as the government has to provide them with basic needs like shelter, food, utilities and health care. Instead of allocating money on perverted minds, the government can clamp down on sexual harassment and fund the security of communities where children will grow up safely and happily. Additionally, should death penalty be imposed, it will put people who are prone to assault others off from committing crime as it will give an insight that they will not get away slightly. In conclusion, I do believe that society must get rid of harmful people whose life is a real threat for all. Their inferior attitude renders corporal punishment inevitable. The government would supply citizens basic needs rather than wasting money on dangerous prisoners.
It is
generally
considered that corporal punishment
has to
be enacted
in order to secure safety in society. I do consider that
some
criminals definitely deserve
being sentenced
to death.

First of all
,
people
who threaten the peace of society with their malicious attitudes towards
children
and innocent
people
must
be
harshly
sentenced. It is irrefutable that, innumerable
children
have been molesting
sexually
by perverts in
different
places of the world.
Children
being subjected
to sexual harassment suffer from it both
physically
and
psychologically
as result most of them resort to suicide to relieve this trauma.
Moreover
, not
only
does it afflict raped
people
,
but
it
also
takes its heavy toll on their family and friends. The rehabilitation of these villains is out of question and
being sentenced
to corporal punishment serves their right.

Secondly
, taking care of
some
criminals is a financial burden for the
government
as the
government
has to
provide them with basic needs like shelter, food, utilities and health care.
Instead
of allocating money on perverted minds, the
government
can clamp down on sexual harassment and fund the security of communities where
children
will grow up
safely
and
happily
.
Additionally
, should death penalty
be imposed
, it will put
people
who are prone to assault others off from committing crime as it will give an insight that they will not
get
away
slightly
.

In conclusion
, I do believe that society
must
get
rid of harmful
people
whose life is a real threat for all. Their inferior attitude renders corporal punishment inevitable. The
government
would supply citizens basic needs
rather
than wasting money on
dangerous
prisoners.
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IELTS essay Some people believed that in order to have peaceful life we should restore death penalty.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
268 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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