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Some people think that the main factors influencing a child’s development these days are things such as television, friends, and music. Others believe that the family still remains more important. Discuss both opinions and give your opinion. v.4

There are spilt opinion about a child growth. A section of society conceive that television, friends and music has a positive impact on development of child, whereas other group of thinkers consider that family play a vital role. To arrive on a rational judgement, both viewpoints must be discussed first. The opponents have three main arguments to justify there position. Firstly, a student can edify themselves by watching channel which are broadcasted on silver box. As a television possesses audio as well as video compnent and so it has a great impact on cognitive function of little one. secondly, social skill such as sharing and cooperation are likely to develop as they spend a time with friend. finally, they also believe that concentration and attention power also increase by hearing music. For illustration, it has proven that when hear music alone with studying which is highly beneficial. As a consequence, it boost memory power. On the contrary, the proponents claim there on view. To begin, number of children behave as a parent that is because they noticed them and try to instill bad or good quality by glancing over there behaviour. To illustrate, if a child noticed that parents are criminal they would obviously try to follow there step. In addition moral values such as showing politeness kindness compassion are taught by parent right from a childhood. Thus personality of a child is depend upon the value instilled by their parents. To conclude, while there are benefits of watching television, being with friend or hearing a music to some extent, I argued that family play dominant role in growth of child's intellectuals function. so it is very necessary for a family to adopt holistic approach that allows a child to grow it full potential
There are
spilt
opinion about a
child
growth. A section of society conceive that television, friends and
music
has a
positive
impact on development of
child
, whereas other group of thinkers consider that family play a vital role. To
arrive on
a rational judgement, both viewpoints
must
be discussed
first
.

The opponents have three main arguments to justify there position.
Firstly
, a student can edify themselves by watching channel which
are broadcasted
on silver box. As a television possesses audio
as well
as video
compnent
and
so
it has a great impact on cognitive function of
little
one.
secondly
, social
skill
such as sharing and cooperation are likely to develop as they spend a time with friend.
finally
, they
also
believe that concentration and attention power
also
increase by hearing
music
. For illustration, it has proven that when hear
music
alone with studying which is
highly
beneficial. As a consequence, it
boost
memory power.

On the contrary
, the proponents claim there on view. To
begin
, number of children behave as a parent
that is
because
they noticed them and try to instill
bad
or
good
quality by glancing over there
behaviour
. To illustrate, if a
child
noticed that parents are criminal they would
obviously
try to follow
there
step. In
addition
moral values such as showing politeness kindness compassion
are taught
by parent right from a childhood.
Thus
personality of a
child
is
depend
upon the value instilled by their parents.

To conclude
, while there are benefits of watching television, being with friend or hearing a
music
to
some
extent, I argued that family play dominant role in growth of child's intellectuals function.
so
it is
very
necessary for a family to adopt holistic approach that
allows
a
child
to grow it full
potential
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I love commuting between languages just like I love commuting between cultures and cities.
Elif Safak

IELTS essay Some people think that the main factors influencing a child's development these days are things such as television, friends, and music. Other believe that the family still remains more important. dicuss both opinions and give your opinion.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
293 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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