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Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with his view?

Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and this money could be better spent elsewhere. BqLV
Art has an essential role to explore the country’s history and heritage. Few people frequently argued that government should be allocated more money to other sectors rather than arts because people’s basic needs should be put before luxuries. I completely disagree with this idea and in this essay, I will support my opinion with examples. Firstly, art is the way to express an idea and communicate concepts that help to generation to interact with each other. The artist can convey their knowledge, to with audience through their work. Besides, some people are introverted to share their opinion and views while it plays a vital role to invent people’s creativity and creates a communication bridge. The best example is the disabled art school in the UK that always encourages children who can acquire skills through it. Thus, local people and government should focus on it. Another reason, art teaches people about their own culture and history which gives us a feeling about roots and ancestral past. Additionally, through art, we can find a sense of identity and know about historical changes, how they evolved and developed over time. For instance, the famous art of ‘Monalisa’ was painted by Leonardo Vinci where he revealed the fascinating story, tradition, and culture before1500 years. Consequently, art should be accessible for all ages to know the background. Moreover, there has an argument that art is not vital for spend more budgets whereas other facilities should be get prioritized. However, I totally disagree with this statement because people can be inspired by art and promote harmony in society. In order that the government is responsible for protecting the culture and the money can be used to restore and preserve it. In conclusion, the government should emphasize it for preservation where people can boost their interest in art. Personally, I believe that art can promote our national pride.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Art
has an essential role to explore the country’s history and heritage. Few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
frequently
argued that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
be allocated
more money to other sectors
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
basic needs should
be put
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
luxuries. I completely disagree with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
and in this essay, I will support my opinion with examples.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
is the way to express an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
and communicate concepts that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to generation to interact with each other. The artist can convey their knowledge, to with audience through their work.
Besides
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are introverted
to share their opinion and views while it plays a vital role to invent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
creativity and creates a communication bridge. The best example is the disabled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
school in the UK that always encourages children who can acquire
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
through it.
Thus
, local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should focus on it.

Another reason,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
teaches
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
culture and history which gives us a feeling about roots and ancestral past.
Additionally
, through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
, we can find a sense of identity and know about historical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
, how they evolved and developed over time.
For instance
, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
of ‘
Possible spelling mistake found.
Monalisa
’
was painted
by Leonardo Vinci where he revealed the fascinating story, tradition, and culture before1500 years.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
should be accessible for all ages to know the background.

Moreover
, there has an argument that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
is not vital for spend more budgets whereas other facilities should be
Did you mean "got", "gotten"?
get
prioritized.
However
, I
totally
disagree with this statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
be inspired
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and promote harmony in society. In order that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is responsible for protecting the culture and the money can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to restore and preserve it.

In conclusion
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should emphasize it for preservation where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can boost their interest in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
.
Personally
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
can promote our national pride.
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IELTS essay Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and this money could be better spent elsewhere.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
311 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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