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Some people think that the best way to succeed in life is to get a university education, while others disagree and say that it is no longer true nowadays. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

Some people think that the best way to succeed in life is to get a university education, while others disagree and say that it is no longer true nowadays. QMYD3
Education is the fundamental right of children and it leads to an individual process. While majority of people believe that high degree education is the best way to succeed, others think that it changed now. In my opinion, diplom is not mandatory to be successful man as there are other crucial factors which determine a person’s success. On the one hand, if person has an incredable, interesting idea and entusiasm to develop it. He will succeed in their job. From my point of view, any person can become a successful entrepreneur, they just need a hardworking nature and completely ambition about achieving his or her goal and focus as well. For example, Stive Jobs who started the company that called Apple, that is one of the most popular and rich companies at the moment. He had only a school degree, good team, and great idea. Resultantly, aspirants need motivation and guidance to complete their dreams. On the other hand, people that agree with importance of University education have reason to believe that. If you get a University education then you will have a good degree and in university placements you will have a chance to hire by the best companies with a good salary package. With a diplom students has a guarantee to work, and some kind of backup. For example, recent research shows that if you have a University degree, then you will have a 75% chance to be successful in your life. However, it seems to me that havind an university degree is great, but not essential. And nobody has rights to force you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
is the fundamental right of children and it leads to an individual process. While
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is the best way to succeed, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
. In my opinion,
Possible spelling mistake found.
diplom
is not mandatory to be successful
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
as there are other crucial factors which determine a person’s success.

On the one hand, if person has an
Possible spelling mistake found.
incredable
, interesting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
entusiasm
to develop it. He will succeed in their job.

From my point of view, any person can become a successful entrepreneur, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
need a hardworking nature and completely ambition about achieving
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
his or her
goal and focus
as well
.
For example
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Stive
Jobs who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
that called Apple,
that is
one of the most popular and rich
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
at the moment. He had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
team, and great
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.
Resultantly
, aspirants need motivation and guidance to complete their dreams.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
have reason to believe that. If you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
then you will have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
and in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
placements you will have a chance to hire by the best
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
with a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
salary package. With a
Possible spelling mistake found.
diplom
students has a guarantee to work, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
kind of backup.
For example
, recent research
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that if you have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
, then you will have a 75% chance to be successful in your life.

However
, it seems to me that
Possible spelling mistake found.
havind
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
is great,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not essential. And nobody has rights to force
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
you
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IELTS essay Some people think that the best way to succeed in life is to get a university education, while others disagree and say that it is no longer true nowadays.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
265 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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