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Some people think that the best way to reduce crimes is to apply Ionger prison sentences! other people think that there are better methods of doing so. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that the best way to reduce crimes is to apply Ionger prison sentences! other people think that there are better methods of doing so. aqrbY
Crime is a serious problem across the world and many countries are trying to deal with this issue. Asection of society believes that prison sentences for a long duration can help to reduce crime, whilst others argue that there are other better ways to solve this problem in the following essay will discuss and give an opinion through these arguments. offenders should be punished with a long prison sentence. there is a number of a nation that believes that people who commit a crime should spend in prison. firstly, a person who is doing the crimes such as sexual assault, murderer, and drug distributor should be put in jail for a long period. It helps teenagers and innocent people live in a safe World. secondly, long prison gives this opportunity to a guilty person to makeover their character. it would be better for their personality because they will learn the lesson of life in prison and think about whatever they did in society, as a result, prisons ensure the safety for a nation out of the jail. however, I believed that another way such as improve education facilities and employment can solve these issues effectively. when people have sufficient education and job opportunities keep them away from crimes because they are busy with their good life. For example, in Sweden education is free for everybody, and their government to try to create a lot of occupations for people. This is the reason why Sweden is one of the Peaceful countries where the crime rate is lower than in other nations. In conclusion, I believe that send guilty people to prison according to their crime might be a good way. However alternative ways such as educating people and giving them resources to earn are more beneficial.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Crime
is a serious problem across the world and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries are trying to deal with this issue.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Asection
of society believes that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
sentences for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
duration can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
, whilst others argue that there are other better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
to solve this problem in the following essay will discuss and give an opinion through these arguments.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
offenders
should
be punished
with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
sentence.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
there
is a number of a nation that believes that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who commit a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
should spend in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
firstly
, a person who is doing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
such as sexual assault, murderer, and drug distributor should
be put
in jail for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
period. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
and innocent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a safe World.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
gives this opportunity to a guilty person to makeover their character.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
would be better for their personality
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they will learn the lesson of life in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about whatever they did in society,
as a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prisons
ensure the safety for a nation out of the jail.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
however
, I believed that another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
such as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
education facilities and employment can solve these issues
effectively
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have sufficient education and job opportunities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
them away from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are busy with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
life.
For example
, in Sweden education is free for everybody, and their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to try to create
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
occupations for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. This is the reason why Sweden is one of the Peaceful countries where the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rate is lower than in other nations.

In conclusion
, I believe that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
guilty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
according to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
might be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
alternative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
such as educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and giving them resources to earn are more beneficial.
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IELTS essay Some people think that the best way to reduce crimes is to apply Ionger prison sentences! other people think that there are better methods of doing so.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
295 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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