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Some people think that the best way to learn about business is to study a course at college or university. Others believe that there are other better ways to learn about business. Discuss both views and give your opinion

It is often argued by some people that to get enrolled in some college or university to become an entrepreneur is the most effective way whereas few people think that there are other numerous ways to get to know about business skills. I opine that individual learn more from practice and experience to excel in their skills. On one hand, some people think that professional degree or a certificate is necessary to start a business venture. As individual can get knowledge from textbooks about the business strategies which need to be followed to run a successful business. There are rules and facts related to field are given in books which are worthy to learn. In addition, while course intake person will get a opportunities to learn about a complications in a case studies that successful businesses have ever faced. On other hand, there are people who claims that to practice your skills and get some experience help more to learn about business. By performing things practically will give a platform to do mistakes, learn from those and improve their problem-solving abilities. Most of the top-notch businessmen in the world like Bill Gates were college dropouts. They started their own business and now running a most successful company. In my opinion, no doubt courses are the safest approach for individual to pursue a career but there would be no such need of theoretical knowledge if individual is passionate to practice on skills and get some experience. It will surely help a person to take their business to new heights
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
enrolled in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
college or university to become an entrepreneur is the most effective way whereas few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that there are other numerous ways to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. I opine that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
more from practice and experience to excel in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

On one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that professional degree or a certificate is necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
venture.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
knowledge from textbooks about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
strategies which need to
be followed
to run a successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
. There are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and facts related to field are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
in books which are worthy to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
.
In addition
, while course intake person will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "a opportunity" or simply "opportunities"?
a opportunities
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
about
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "a complication" or simply "complications"?
a complications
in a case studies that successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
have ever faced.

On other hand, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
Did you mean "claim"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'people' should be used.
claims
that to practice your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
experience
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
more to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
. By performing things
practically
will give a platform to do mistakes,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
from those and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their problem-solving abilities. Most of the top-notch businessmen in the world like Bill Gates were college dropouts. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
running a most successful
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

In my opinion, no doubt courses are the safest approach for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
to pursue a career
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there would be no such need of theoretical knowledge if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
is passionate to practice on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
experience. It will
surely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
a person to take their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
to new
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
heights
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IELTS essay Some people think that the best way to learn about business is to study a course at college or university. Others believe that there are other better ways to learn about business. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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