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Some people think that spending a lot on holding wedding parties, birthday parties and other celebrations is just a waste of money. Others, however, think that these are necessary for individuals and the society. v. 11

Some people think that spending a lot on holding wedding parties, birthday parties and other celebrations is just a waste of money. Others, however, think that these are necessary for individuals and the society. v. 11 1eKM
In the modern world, throwing parties can be challenging for its organizers. However, there is an opinion that it can create a new society, which is more organized and cheerful. Personally, I reckon that celebrations’ number should be limited in order to make a conscious society. It is widely known that ordinary people spend the significant amount of money on the celebrations of parties, such as weddings, birthdays and graduation. Consequently, they can face with shortage of money after the celebrations. A good illustration of this is weddings in Central Asia, where citizens take loans and credits in order to celebrate parties. Furthermore, parties can lead to an unhealthy lifestyle. That is to say, not controlling your diet can lead to the deterioration of well-being. To illustrate, many party animals are suffering from diseases relating to their digestion. On the other hand, such kinds of events can be beneficial for the individuals as well as for the society. First of all, it can create a new community. It is widely accepted that if individuals spend their time at the parties, they can communicate with other people. As a result, they can develop their soft skills. For instance, the community can get a benefit from these communications, because it can lead to the prosperity. Secondly, the parties can leave good memories. The important thing is that individuals get various emotions and enjoyment. For example, many people can feel sadness, when they are graduated from the universities or schools. To conclude, although celebrations of events can bring various emotions and amusement, personally, I believe that their number should be regulated, because people can waste their money. In addition, it can create some minor problems for the health. In the modern world, throwing parties can be challenging for its organizers. However, there is an opinion that it can create a new society, which is more organized and cheerful. Personally, I reckon that celebrations’ number should be limited in order to make a conscious society. It is widely known that ordinary people spend the significant amount of money on the celebrations of parties, such as weddings, birthdays and graduation. Consequently, they can face with shortage of money after the celebrations. A good illustration of this is weddings in Central Asia, where citizens take loans and credits in order to celebrate parties. Furthermore, parties can lead to an unhealthy lifestyle. That is to say, not controlling your diet can lead to the deterioration of well-being. To illustrate, a plethora of party animals are suffering from diseases relating to their digestion. On the other hand, such kinds of events can be beneficial for the individuals as well as for the society. First of all, it can create a new community. It is widely accepted that if individuals spend their time at the parties, they can communicate with other people. As a result, they can develop their soft skills. For instance, the community can get a benefit from these communications, because it can lead to the prosperity. Secondly, the parties can leave good memories. The critical thing is that individuals get various emotions and enjoyment. For example, a number of people can feel sadness, when they are graduated from the universities or schools. To conclude, although celebrations of events can bring various emotions and amusement, personally, I believe that their number should be regulated, in light of the fact that people can waste their money. In addition, it can create a number of minor problems for the health. 14 Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more 27 Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer 1 Mistakes 4 paragraphs285 words 9 Overall Band Score Coherence and Cohesion: 6. 0 Structure your answers in logical paragraphs? One main idea per paragraph Include an introduction and conclusion Support main points with an explanation and then an example Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately Vary your linking phrases using synonyms Lexical Resources: 5. 5 Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes Grammatical Range: 6. 5 Use a variety of complex and simple sentences Check your writing for errors Task Achievement: 7. 0 Answer all parts of the question? Present relevant ideas Fully explain these ideas Support ideas with relevant, specific examples Labels Descriptions? Currently is not available Band score ≥ 7 Band score ≤ 6 Similar essay posts: 6 band Some people think that spending a lot on holding wedding parties, birthday parties and other celebrations is just a waste of money. Others, however, think that these are necessary for individuals and the society. v. 1 Throwing parties can be expensive. While some people do not find these fancy gatherings worth what they cost, others believe such events are important to both individuals and the society. People choose to throw parties for a number of reasons. For starters, they can make better teams. Project kick-. . . 6 band Some people think that spending a lot on holding wedding parties, birthday parties and other celebrations is just a waste of money. Others, however, think that these are necessary for individuals and the society. 2. . Model Essay 1: In the current world, most of the people like to celebrate any special occasion by inviting a lot of people. The discussion that throwing too much money to hold parties like birthday, marriage or any other special event is a debatable one, with strong logics provided by the supp. . . 8 band Some people think that spending a lot on holding wedding parties, birthday parties and other celebrations is just a waste of money. Others, however, think that there are necessary for individuals and the society. v. 7 It is true that parties or functions are the best place to meet new people. However, while some believe that arranging parties are a waste of money, I agree with those who feel that parties are very important for communities and people. On the one hand, it could be argued that there are a few reaso. . . 8 band Some people think that spending a lot on holding wedding parties birthday parties and other celebrations is just a waste of money others, however, think that these are necessary for individuals and the society v. 8 In recent years, the celebration is one of the most important activities in people's traditional life. A group of people believes that holding many parties like wedding parties, birthday parties or any other special events are waste of too much money. Others believe that these parties are most impor. . . 8. 5 band Some people think that spending a lot on holding wedding parties, birthday parties and other celebrations is just a waste of money. Others, however, think that there are necessary for individuals and the society. v. 10 It is generally believed by a section of society that the expenditures on marriage functions, name day parties and other events are usually the wastage of earning. In contrary, it is thought by another section of the community that it plays a vital role for an each person in society. I strongly beli. . . Recent essay posts: 9 band Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. v. 112 v. 67 9 band Television Sporting shows such as the Olympics motivate the youth who do not like to exercise much. v. 5 9 band Air traffic is increasingly leading to more noise, pollution, and airport constuction. One reason for this is the growth in low-cost passenger flights, often to holiday destinations. Some people say that government should try to reduce air traffic by taxing it more heavily. v. 2 9 band Countries with a long average working time are more economically successful than those countries which do not have a long working time. v. 7 9 band Some people say companies should require all employees to wear uniforms at work. Others think it is unnecessary. v. 1 Online IELTS Mock practice 2021 ielts listening practice 2021 with answers free online ielts general reading test 2021 ielts academic reading practice 2021 with answers IELTS Writing Correction Service IELTS Essay Samples Band 9 Academic IELTS Writing Task 1 Samples Band 9 General IELTS Writing Task 1 Answers Band 8 IELTS Speaking Part 1 2 3 Answers Band 9 IELTS Recent Academic Writing Task 1 Questions Recent IELTS General Writing Task 1 Questions Recent IELTS Speaking Questions Parts 1 2 3 Recent IELTS Essay Topics 2021 IELTS Synonyms Words List for Reading pdf Ideas for IELTS writing task 1 2 topics IELTS Essays Letters Templates pdf 2021 © IELTS69. com
In the modern world,
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throwing
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parties
can be challenging for its organizers.
However
, there is an opinion that it can
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create
a
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new
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society
, which is more organized and cheerful.
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Personally
, I reckon that
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celebrations’
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number
should
be limited
in
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order
to
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make
a conscious
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society
. It is
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widely
known that ordinary
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people
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spend
the significant amount of
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money
on the
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celebrations
of
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parties
, such as
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weddings
, birthdays and graduation.
Consequently
, they can face with shortage of
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money
after the
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celebrations
. A
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good
illustration of this is
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weddings
in Central Asia, where citizens take loans and credits in
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order
to celebrate
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parties
.
Furthermore
,
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parties
can
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lead
to an unhealthy lifestyle.
That is
to say, not controlling your diet can
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lead
to the deterioration of well-being. To illustrate,
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many
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party
animals are suffering from diseases relating to their digestion. On the
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other
hand, such kinds of
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events
can be beneficial for the
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individuals
as well
as for the
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society
.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, it can
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create
a
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new
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community
. It is
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widely
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accepted
that if
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individuals
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spend
their
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time
at the
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parties
, they can communicate with
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other
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people
.
As a result
, they can develop their soft
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
For instance
, the
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community
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a benefit from these communications,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it can
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lead
to the prosperity.
Secondly
, the
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parties
can
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leave
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good
memories. The
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important
thing is that
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individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
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various
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emotions
and enjoyment.
For example
,
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many
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people
can feel sadness, when they
are graduated
from the universities or schools.
To conclude
, although
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celebrations
of
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events
can bring
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various
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emotions
and amusement,
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personally
, I
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believe
that their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
should
be regulated
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
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people
can
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waste
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
.
In addition
, it can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
minor problems for the health.

In the modern world,
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throwing
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parties
can be challenging for its organizers.
However
, there is an opinion that it can
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create
a
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new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
, which is more organized and cheerful.
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Personally
, I reckon that
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celebrations’
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number
should
be limited
in
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order
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a conscious society.

It is
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widely
known that ordinary
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people
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spend
the significant amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrations
of
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parties
, such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weddings
, birthdays and graduation.
Consequently
, they can face with shortage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
after the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrations
. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
illustration of this is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weddings
in Central Asia, where citizens take loans and credits in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
to celebrate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to an unhealthy lifestyle.
That is
to say, not controlling your diet can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to the deterioration of well-being. To illustrate, a plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
animals are suffering from diseases relating to their digestion.

On the
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other
hand, such kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
can be beneficial for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
as well
as for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, it can
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create
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
. It is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
widely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
that if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
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spend
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
, they can communicate with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
As a result
, they can develop their soft
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
For instance
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a benefit from these communications,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to the prosperity.
Secondly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
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good
memories. The critical thing is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emotions
and enjoyment.
For example
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can feel sadness, when they
are graduated
from the universities or schools.

To conclude
, although
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celebrations
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
can bring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emotions
and amusement,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personally
, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
should
be regulated
, in light of the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
.
In addition
, it can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of minor problems for the health.

14

Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more

27

Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer

1

Mistakes

4 paragraphs285 words

9

Overall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Band
Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6. 0

Structure your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
answers
in logical paragraphs? One main
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
per paragraph

Include an introduction and conclusion

Support main points with an explanation and then an example

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Use
cohesive linking words
accurately
and
appropriately


Vary your linking phrases using synonyms

Lexical Resources: 5. 5

Possible agreement error. The noun 'Try' seems to be countable, so consider using: "tries".
Try
to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Use
less common question specific words that
accurately
convey meaning

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Check
your work for spelling and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
word
formation mistakes

Grammatical Range: 6. 5

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Use
a variety of complex and simple sentences

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Check
your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
for errors

Task Achievement: 7.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
0 Answer
all parts of the question? Present relevant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas


Fully
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas


Support
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
with relevant, specific examples

Labels Descriptions?
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Currently
is not available

Band score ≥
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
7 Band
score ≤ 6

Similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
posts:

6

band

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wedding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
, birthday
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrations
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. Others,
however
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that these are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
necessary
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
. v.
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1 Throwing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
can be expensive. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not find these fancy gatherings worth what they cost, others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
to both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
choose to throw
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of reasons. For starters, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
better teams. Project kick-.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.


6

band

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wedding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
, birthday
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrations
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. Others,
however
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that these are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
necessary
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
. 2.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Model
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Essay
1: In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
world, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like to celebrate any special occasion by inviting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. The discussion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
throwing
too much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to hold
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
like birthday, marriage or any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
special
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
is a debatable one, with strong logics provided by the supp.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.


8

band

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wedding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
, birthday
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrations
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. Others,
however
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
necessary
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
. v. 7

It is true that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
or functions are the best place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
However
, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that arranging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
are a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with those who feel that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communities
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. On the one hand, it could
be argued
that there are a few
Possible spelling mistake found.
reaso
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.


8

band

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wedding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
birthday
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrations
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
others,
however
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that these are
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necessary
for
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individuals
and the
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society
v. 8

In
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recent
years, the
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celebration
is one of the most
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important
activities in
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people
's traditional life. A group of
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people
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believes
that
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holding
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many
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parties
like
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wedding
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parties
, birthday
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parties
or any
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other
special
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events
are
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waste
of too much
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money
. Others
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believe
that these
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parties
are most
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.
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.
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.


8. 5

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Some
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people
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think
that
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spending
a
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lot
on
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holding
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wedding
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parties
, birthday
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parties
and
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other
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celebrations
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a
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waste
of
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money
. Others,
however
,
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think
that there are
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necessary
for
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individuals
and the
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society
. v. 10

It is
generally
believed by a section of
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society
that the expenditures on marriage functions, name day
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parties
and
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other
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events
are
usually
the wastage of earning. In contrary, it is
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thought
by another section of the
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community
that it plays a vital role for
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "an" or "each" is left.
an each
person in
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society
. I
strongly
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beli
.
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.
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.


Recent
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band

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Some
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people
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think
that all university students should study whatever they like. Others
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believe
that they should
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only
be
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allowed
to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. v. 112 v. 67

9

band

Television Sporting
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shows
such as the Olympics motivate the youth who do not like to exercise much. v. 5

9

band

Air traffic is
increasingly
leading to more noise, pollution, and airport
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constuction
. One reason for this is the growth in low-cost passenger flights,
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often
to holiday destinations.
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Some
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people
say that
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government
should try to
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reduce
air traffic by taxing it more
heavily
. v. 2

9

band

Countries with a long average working
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time
are more
economically
successful than those countries which do not have a long working
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time
. v. 7

9

band

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Some
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people
say
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companies
should require all employees to wear uniforms at work. Others
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think
it is unnecessary. v. 1

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IELTS essay Some people think that spending a lot on holding wedding parties, birthday parties and other celebrations is just a waste of money. Others, however, think that these are necessary for individuals and the society. v. 11

Essay
  American English
14 paragraphs
1474 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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