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Some people think that physical strength is important for success in sport, while other people think that mental strength is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that physical strength is important for success in sport, while other people think that mental strength is more important. Lg68
When sports are discussed, some people think that an ideal quality would be physical strength, while the other would argue that mental strength is more important. In my opinion, a balance between both of these key strengths would be the perfect winning strategy! Consider sports like Cricket, Football, Basketball etc, physical strength is an absolute necessity for them. It is so because firstly, these sports require the players to be on the field / court for hours together and secondly, they need to be on the move constantly. This requires an immense amount of stamina. Also, when the player needs to run as fast as possible or take a strong shot at the ball, their physical strength would drive them towards their goal. The same applies to the other kinds of sports like badminton or lawn tennis as well. Then you would wonder why do some people say mental strength is important? Well, here is the answer. While physical strength would add power to the game, the secret to actually winning is 'strategy'. How to cover the batsman so that he cannot hit the boundary, how to tackle the ball from the other team's player or how hard / soft the badminton shot needs to be so that the opponent misses it? These are some of the key ideas that require mental strength in order to win the game. When the right amount of force and tactics are clubbed together, a normal game would change into a winning game. Hard work and smart work go hand-in-hand always. In contrast to constantly running across the pitch to win points, planning smartly and strongly hitting the right boundary shots would help the team win better. Hence, in conclusion, I suggest that having a balance between physical and mental strength is very important to gain success in sports.
When
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sports
are discussed
,
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some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that an ideal quality would be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
, while the other would argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. In my opinion, a balance between both of these key
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strengths
would be the perfect winning strategy!

Consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
like Cricket, Football, Basketball etc,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
is an absolute necessity for them. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
firstly
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
require the players to be on the field / court for hours together and
secondly
, they need to be on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
constantly
. This requires an immense amount of stamina.
Also
, when the player needs to run as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
as possible or take a strong shot at the ball, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
would drive them towards their goal. The same
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
applies to
the other kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
like badminton or lawn tennis
as well
.

Then you would wonder why do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
say
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
? Well, here is the answer. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
power to the game, the secret to actually winning is 'strategy'. How to cover the batsman
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that he cannot hit the boundary, how to tackle the ball from the other team's player or how
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
/ soft the badminton shot needs to be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the opponent misses it? These are
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
key
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
that require
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
in order to win the game.

When the right amount of force and tactics
are clubbed
together, a normal game would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
into a winning game.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Hard
work and smart work go hand-in-hand
The adverb 'always' is usually not used at the end of a sentence.
always
.
In contrast
to
constantly
running across the pitch to win points, planning
smartly
and
strongly
hitting the right boundary shots would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the team win better.
Hence
,
in conclusion
, I suggest that having a balance between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to gain success in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that physical strength is important for success in sport, while other people think that mental strength is more important.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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