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: It is suggested that all the young adults should undertake a period of unpaid work helping people in the community. Does it bring more benefits or drawbacks to the community and the young people?

: It is suggested that all the young adults should undertake a period of unpaid work helping people in the community. Does it bring more benefits or drawbacks to the community and the young people? Vdj3
Society has been divided on the basis of financial success. While some people give significance to social position, others believe values like empathy, respect and beloningness as essential. I strongly prefer values over money. In the forthcominh paragraphs, I will give reasons to support the aforementioned opinion. To commence with, a persons' worthCannot be judged by the social staus. Although an individual may be financially on a higher rank, they lack social responsibility ti help poor. Moreover, material possessions are only for their personal conveinence. It is more important that these people use their previlages to help the downtrodden. In a survey conducted by ' The Delhi University' about 30% of rich people are only helping the poor. Therefore, giving them higher status is worthless. On the other hand, if a oerson has emotions such as honour, kidness and trust, then they are respected for ages. Nevertheless, these people even if they are not financially doing great stikk have mindset to help the needy with whatever littke they have. Furthermore, a sense of giving ought to be valued rather than economicak success. In a newspaper article published on the topic of psycological research staes that crime rate is less among people whi have higher emotional quotient In conclusion, a person can be successful by his or her position and possession but it is unfair to give importance on this basis. Infact they should be valued for their other personal traits for instance positivity, compatibility and so on.
Society has
been divided
on the basis of financial success. While
some
people
give significance to social position, others believe values like empathy, respect and
beloningness
as essential. I
strongly
prefer values over money
. In the
forthcominh
paragraphs, I will give reasons to support the aforementioned opinion.

To commence with, a persons'
worthCannot
be judged
by the social
staus
. Although an individual may be
financially
on a higher rank, they lack social responsibility ti
help
poor.
Moreover
, material possessions are
only
for their personal
conveinence
. It is more
important
that these
people
use
their
previlages
to
help
the downtrodden. In a survey conducted by
'
The Delhi University' about 30% of rich
people
are
only
helping the poor.
Therefore
, giving them higher status is worthless.

On the other hand
, if
a
oerson
has emotions such as
honour
,
kidness
and trust, then they
are respected
for ages.
Nevertheless
, these
people
even if they are not
financially
doing great
stikk
have mindset to
help
the needy with whatever
littke
they have.
Furthermore
, a sense of giving ought to
be valued
rather
than
economicak
success. In a newspaper article published on the topic of
psycological
research
staes
that crime rate is less among
people
whi
have higher emotional quotient

In conclusion
, a person can be successful by
his or her
position and possession
but
it is unfair to give importance on this basis.
Infact
they should
be valued
for their other personal traits
for instance
positivity, compatibility and
so
on.
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IELTS essay : It is suggested that all the young adults should undertake a period of unpaid work helping people in the community. Does it bring more benefits or drawbacks to the community and the young people?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
247 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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