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Some people think that parents should supervise their children’s activites closely, while others believe children should have more freedom. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that parents should supervise their children’s activites closely, while others believe children should have more freedom. Kk3L
Many individuals believe that young generations should be given more attention about their exercises by their parents, but those who opposed to former idea contend that this situation may lead to some feasible problems. There are valid arguments on both sides which will be discussed. Supervising of parents is very essential on children’s life especially when they go to study remote place from their parents. Nowadays, there are a lot of influences to groosly impact for chidrens, for example, various contents and videos on network can easily disrupt them from their goals and sometimes are leading them to blind alley. As well as, childrens have a tended to be curious what they want, this is may be smoking, drinking or other bad behaviours. Which is why, childs should be controlled by their family. Another body, it is very important to give a chance for childrens what they want to do. It is not true that parents decide various decisions over childrens. If young generations try to learn subjects which are related to their interestings and they themselves select, they would can easily find their way in life and would feel some satisfaction about what they are doing. It is proved by science that individuals who have taken maturity from the street since childhood are good at conversation and communication with their teammates or other people. To conclude, this is a very crucial to achieve happiness. By way of conclusion, I strictly argued that parents must give a chance or freedom to learn important things from life such as decide decrees or to solve feasible problems, but sometimes should controll.
Many
individuals believe that young generations should be
given
more attention about their exercises by their
parents
,
but
those who opposed to former
idea
contend that this situation may lead to
some
feasible problems. There are valid arguments on both sides which will
be discussed
.

Supervising of
parents
is
very
essential on
children’s
life
especially
when they go to study remote place from their
parents
. Nowadays, there are
a lot of
influences to
groosly
impact for
chidrens
,
for example
, various contents and videos on network can
easily
disrupt them from their goals and
sometimes
are leading them to blind alley.
As well
as,
childrens have
a tended to be curious what they want, this is may be smoking, drinking or other
bad
behaviours
. Which is why,
childs
should
be controlled
by their family.

Another body, it is
very
important
to give a chance for
childrens
what they want to do. It is not true that
parents
decide various decisions over
childrens
. If young generations try to learn subjects which
are related
to their
interestings and
they themselves select, they
would can
easily
find their way in life and would feel
some
satisfaction about what they are doing. It
is proved
by science that individuals who have taken maturity from the street since childhood are
good
at conversation and communication with their teammates or other
people
.
To conclude
, this is a
very
crucial to achieve happiness.

By way of conclusion, I
strictly
argued that
parents
must
give a chance or freedom to learn
important
things from life such as decide decrees or to solve feasible problems,
but
sometimes
should
controll
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that parents should supervise their children’s activites closely, while others believe children should have more freedom.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
269 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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