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Some people think that parents should discourage their children from pursuing an education in the arts. They argue that children should instead focus on the maths and sciences as these are areas that can lead to good jobs and help society. Do you agree with this approach to education?

Some people think that parents should discourage their children from pursuing an education in the arts. They argue that children should instead focus on the maths and sciences as these are areas that can lead to good jobs and help society. Do you agree with this approach to education? jb38d
Nowadays, parents' views on their children's education suggest that they should only acquire specific and improved science skills instead of art. I totally disagree with this assertion and provide evidence for why art and science are equally important these days. Primarily, it is thought by a handful of people that art education by children is a waste of time and principal of unemployment. Even though this does not fully cover material needs, whenever people enter the feeling of a bad mood, they might seek shelter in music or drawing - either by singing, performing, or painting, through these art activities, humans may seize the chance to alleviate the stress which they accumulated during the harsh time of working. Not only can spiritual nourishment be obtained from art, but there have also been periods in which art itself has made a great contribution to the development of scientific progress as well. The example of Leonardo da Vinci, a man with a high level of critical thinking and a master of painting, shows that was also able to create basic instruments such as a parachute and a diving suit. Besides, in the 21st century, artists and people who have thoroughly studied science are intersecting in many fields. Managers can use the services of graphic designers or architects appropriately, if they need a different approach to the corporate image, brand, and specific construction of the building. Finally, it can be shown confidently that young people with creativity and soft skills are more involved in the management position than an employee who has mastered the STEM sciences. In conclusion, both methods of education that young people need to learn are necessary to them in order to achieve good jobs and benefit society.
Nowadays, parents' views on their children's education suggest that they should
only
acquire specific and
improved
science
skills
instead
of
art
. I
totally
disagree with this assertion and provide evidence for why
art
and science are
equally
important
these days.

Primarily
, it is
thought
by a handful of
people
that
art
education by children is a waste of time and principal of unemployment.
Even though
this does not
fully
cover material needs, whenever
people
enter the feeling of a
bad
mood, they might seek shelter in music or drawing
-
either by singing, performing, or painting, through these
art
activities, humans may seize the chance to alleviate the
stress
which they accumulated during the harsh time of working. Not
only
can spiritual nourishment
be obtained
from
art
,
but
there have
also
been periods in which
art
itself has made a great contribution to the development of scientific progress
as well
. The example of Leonardo da Vinci, a
man
with a high level of critical thinking and a master of painting,
shows
that was
also
able to create basic instruments such as a parachute and a diving suit.

Besides
, in the 21st century, artists and
people
who have
thoroughly
studied science are intersecting in
many
fields. Managers can
use
the services of graphic designers or architects
appropriately
, if they need a
different
approach to the corporate image, brand, and specific construction of the building.
Finally
, it can
be shown
confidently
that young
people
with creativity and soft
skills
are more involved in the management position than an employee who has mastered the STEM sciences.

In conclusion
, both methods of education that young
people
need to learn are necessary to them in order to achieve
good
jobs and benefit society.
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IELTS essay Some people think that parents should discourage their children from pursuing an education in the arts. They argue that children should instead focus on the maths and sciences as these are areas that can lead to good jobs and help society. Do you agree with this approach to education?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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