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Some people think that newspapers are the best way to learn news. However, others believe that they can learn news better through other media. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. v.3

Some people think that newspapers are the best way to learn news. However, others believe that they can learn news better through other media. v. 3
In the past, people used to acquire news from newspapers. However, thanks to modern technology, we have more ways to receive information nowadays. Many people prefer 'modern' methods other than newspaper, for example, social media, are better because they are updated more regularly. Most people read news from their phones rather than buying newspapers which are old-fashioned. I think different methods get informed have their own advantages and disadvantages, I will discuss this further in my essay. The newspaper is one of the greatest inventions throughout history because it revolutionized the way people received information. People began to understand what happened around the world via the publishing of newspapers. People started to know what was happening thousands miles away from their home. Some newspapers like The Times founded in the early 18th century still run today with average daily circulation of a tremendous number. Experienced and well-trained journalists are hired in order to produce news with the best quality. Also, high quality report can be a valuable resource for bankers and researchers. Those people usually provide consultations for the government to decide public policy and foreign affairs. At present, people have more and more alternatives. Newspapers seem to be outdated in our daily life. We have internet. We have cell phones. In this era, everyone could be a journalist. Hurray! We don't have to waste a lot of time to wait for editing and printing newspapers. It is much more efficient. Many citizen journalists post their videos and their reports on social media. However, they are usually a lot of fake news which may mislead people. For example, when the tsunami hit Japan in 2012, there was a rumour in the internet which leads to pressure purchase of sea salt. To sum up, the newspaper is generally considered as a resource that can be trusted. However, the internet is much more efficient.
In the past,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to acquire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
.
However
, thanks to modern technology, we have more ways to receive information nowadays.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer 'modern' methods other than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
,
for example
, social media, are better
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
are updated
more
regularly
. Most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
read
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
from their phones
rather
than buying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
which are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
-fashioned. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
methods
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
informed have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
advantages and disadvantages, I will discuss this
further
in my essay.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
is one of the greatest inventions throughout history
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it revolutionized the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
received information.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
began to understand what happened around the world via the publishing of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to know what was happening thousands miles away from their home.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
like The Times founded in the early 18th century
still
run
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
with average daily circulation of a tremendous number. Experienced and well-trained journalists
are hired
in order to produce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
with the best quality.
Also
, high quality report can be a valuable resource for bankers and researchers. Those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
usually
provide consultations for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to decide public policy and foreign affairs.

At present,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have more and more alternatives.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Newspapers
seem to
be outdated
in our daily life. We have internet. We have cell phones. In this era, everyone could be a journalist. Hurray! We don't
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
waste
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
time to wait for editing and printing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
. It is much more efficient.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
citizen journalists post their videos and their reports on social media.
However
, they are
usually
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
fake
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
which may mislead
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For example
, when the tsunami hit Japan in 2012, there was a
Possible spelling mistake. 'rumour' is British English.
rumour
The usual collocation for technology is "on," not "in." It is better to say this: "on the internet".
in the internet
which leads to pressure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
of sea salt.

To sum up, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
is
generally
considered as a resource that can
be trusted
.
However
, the internet is much more efficient.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that newspapers are the best way to learn news. However, others believe that they can learn news better through other media. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
312 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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