Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people think that money is the best gift for teenagers. do you agree or disagree. v.10

Some people think that money is the best gift for teenagers. v. 10
Needless to emphasize, getting rewards and appreciations to the adolescents will definitely encourage them to achieve more. A lion's share of society argues that it is good to provide money as a price for teenagers. I completely disagree with this notion and in this essay, I will support my opinion with examples. Indeed, one of the best methods to motivate teenagers is giving a gift. However, it is not mandatory to provide cash as a gift. since the child is not in need to have money during their student period, instead, some valuable academic thins would definitely help them to work hard and gain further success in life. To illustrate, teenagers really get inspired when they receive a good kind of books or study materials, hence their prior most aim is to achieve great academic outcomes. Yet another reason why I disagree with gift money is that adolescents may become more keen on collecting a huge amount of cash and they misuse the amount for purchasing unnecessary things. Eventually, they would not value the struggles behind earning money. For example, a growing number of youngsters become drug addicts and the high expense for this they got from their educational institution is from loved ones as a reward for their performance. It is therefore evident cash price will cause the demise of children's good conduct because they are not mature enough to handle such a high amount. By done of the aforementioned arguments, I believe all should support the youngsters by providing valuable needed items as a reward instead of giving cash prizes to avoid any detrimental effects because of keeping the unnecessary amount. It
Needless to emphasize, getting rewards and appreciations to the adolescents will definitely encourage them to achieve more. A lion's share of society argues that it is
good
to provide
money
as a price for
teenagers
. I completely disagree with this notion and in this essay, I will support my opinion with examples.

Indeed
, one of the best methods to motivate
teenagers
is giving a gift.
However
, it is not mandatory to provide
cash
as a gift.
since
the child is not in need to have
money
during their student period,
instead
,
some
valuable academic thins would definitely
help
them to work
hard
and gain
further
success in life. To illustrate,
teenagers
really
get
inspired when they receive a
good
kind of books or study materials,
hence
their prior most aim is to achieve great academic outcomes.

Yet
another reason why I disagree with gift
money
is that adolescents may become more keen on collecting a huge amount of
cash and
they misuse the amount for purchasing unnecessary things.
Eventually
, they would not value the struggles behind earning
money
.
For example
, a growing number of youngsters become drug addicts and the high expense for this they
got
from their educational institution is from
loved
ones as a reward for their performance. It is
therefore
evident
cash
price will cause the demise of children's
good
conduct
because
they are not mature
enough
to handle such a high amount.

By done of the aforementioned arguments, I believe all should support the youngsters by providing valuable needed items as a reward
instead
of giving
cash
prizes to avoid any detrimental effects
because
of keeping the unnecessary amount. It
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that money is the best gift for teenagers. v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
273 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts