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Some people think that it is a good idea to have a detailed plan for activities to do in their free time. Others disagree with this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. v.2

Some people think that it is a good idea to have a detailed plan for activities to do in their free time. Others disagree with this. v. 2
Time is the most precious currency in the modern world. Hence, a vigorous debate has been sparked over whether an elaborated plan for leisure activities in free time is the ideal method. I concur with this perspective. To begin with, proponents contend that planning for recreational activities in spare time is the optimal paradigm. This is because it assists in utilizing the time which leads to achieving coveted results as parents not only meet their personal desires but also satisfy their families’ needs. For example, when parents have a desire to workout at a gym, they make a schedule in order to exercise, and they devote a time to take their children to play at a park so that they allocate the time to fulfil the family obligation and address their personal needs. As a result, by creating a comprehensive blueprint, desired consequences will most probably be followed though. Nevertheless, those that opponents take issue with developing a detailed blueprint for their activities in the leisure time. This is due to the hectic pace of life in the contemporary world resulting in more pressure that might be added to their crammed schedule. For instance, a vast majority of people decide to travel spontaneously at the last moment of their weekend; thus, without any previous plan, they will probably spend spectacular time in a resort town with friends. Therefore, if a recreational activity is less likely to be scheduled, people tend to spend a splendid time as well. In conclusion, planning for leisure-time activity seems the most appropriate method. Consequently, this is my sentiments exactly.
Time
is the most precious currency in the modern world.
Hence
, a vigorous debate has
been sparked
over whether an elaborated plan for leisure
activities
in free
time
is the ideal method. I concur with this perspective.

To
begin
with, proponents contend that planning for recreational
activities
in spare
time
is the optimal paradigm. This is
because
it assists in utilizing the
time
which leads to achieving coveted results as parents not
only
meet
their personal desires
but
also
satisfy their families’ needs.
For example
, when parents have a desire to workout at a gym, they
make
a schedule in order to exercise, and they devote a
time
to take their children to play at a park
so
that they allocate the
time
to fulfil the family obligation and address their personal needs.
As a result
, by creating a comprehensive blueprint, desired consequences will most
probably
be followed
though.

Nevertheless
, those that opponents take issue with developing a detailed blueprint for their
activities
in the leisure
time
. This is due to the hectic pace of life in the contemporary world resulting in more pressure that might be
added
to their crammed schedule.
For instance
, a vast majority of
people
decide to travel
spontaneously
at the last moment of their weekend;
thus
, without any previous plan, they will
probably
spend spectacular
time
in a resort town with friends.
Therefore
, if a recreational
activity
is less likely to
be scheduled
,
people
tend to spend a splendid
time
as well
.

In conclusion
, planning for leisure-time
activity
seems the most appropriate method.
Consequently
, this is my sentiments exactly.
15Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that it is a good idea to have a detailed plan for activities to do in their free time. Others disagree with this. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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