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Some people think that in this modern world people are getting dependent on each other, while others think that this world makes them more independent of each other. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that in this modern world people are getting dependent on each other, while others think that this world makes them more independent of each other. OVgqk
While some believe that the modernisation has made us more reliant on each other, others, however, think that we are more self-reliant and free from dependency on others as the time has progressed. I believe that we have become more independent than any time in the history. People who advocate that we have become more dependent on each other in this modern era often present the idea that our necessity has increased and we need to interact with far more people due to this. This in a way requires us to rely on others for our need. For instance, office executives mostly rely on laundry services, restaurants, house maids, cleaning services and so on to have their necessary works done. In the past, people used to do most of these tasks on their own. Moreover, the prices of education, house, daily commodities etc. is skyrocketing day by day and we need to rely on our parents to have those needs fulfilled until we get a job. When we will become earning members, our parents and children will rely on us. Due to people’s busy schedule and high ambition, they need to socialise and get to know people from different walks of life and this creates a wider circle in which people’s interaction and reliance on each other increase. However, I would agree with the people who opine that modernization has made us free and less reliant on others. In most countries, young children are trying to support their education and living cost. After a certain age, they prefer to stay own his own house. The number of nuclear and single parent family proves that people are less reliant on others. We are free to pick the school, travel to other countries and make our choices for most of the major events in our life including picking our life partners. The progress of the technology has made us more self-reliant and we love to take advantages of the modern tools and devices to make things of our own. For instance, many people these days pick an online lesson than getting admitted to a training institute. Many of us even have the freedom to work from home and this is a paradigm shift in the way we earn our living. Finally, the gender equality and women empowerment movements have greatly made the women free from others reliance and self-dependent and this has all been possible only recently. In conclusion, though some people think that modern era is the time when we are more reliant on each other, I personally believe that we are more free and self-reliant instead.
While
some
believe that the
modernisation
has made us more
reliant
on each
other
, others,
however
,
think
that we are more self-reliant and
free
from dependency on others as the time has progressed. I believe that we have become more independent than any time in the history.

People
who advocate that we have become more dependent on each
other
in this modern era
often
present the
idea
that our necessity has
increased and
we
need
to interact with far more
people
due to this. This in a way requires us to rely on others for our
need
.
For instance
, office executives
mostly
rely on laundry services, restaurants,
house
maids, cleaning services and
so
on to have their necessary works done. In the past,
people
used
to do most of these tasks on their
own
.
Moreover
, the prices of education,
house
, daily commodities etc. is skyrocketing day by
day and
we
need
to rely on our parents to have those
needs
fulfilled until we
get
a job. When we will become earning members, our parents and children will rely on us. Due to
people’s
busy schedule and high ambition, they
need
to
socialise
and
get
to know
people
from
different
walks of life and this creates a wider circle in which
people’s
interaction and reliance on each
other
increase.

However
, I would
agree
with the
people
who opine that
modernization
has made us
free
and less
reliant
on others. In most countries, young children are trying to support their education and living cost. After a certain age, they prefer to stay
own
his
own
house
. The number of nuclear and single parent family proves that
people
are less
reliant
on others. We are
free
to pick the school, travel to
other
countries and
make
our choices for most of the major
events
in our life including picking our life partners. The progress of the technology has made us more
self-reliant and
we
love
to take advantages of the modern tools and devices to
make
things of our
own
.
For instance
,
many
people
these days pick an online lesson than getting admitted to a training institute.
Many
of us even have the freedom to work from home and this is a paradigm shift in the way we earn our living.
Finally
, the gender equality and women empowerment movements have
greatly
made the women
free
from others reliance and self-dependent and this has all been possible
only
recently.

In conclusion
, though
some
people
think
that modern era is the time when we are more
reliant
on each
other
, I
personally
believe that we are more
free
and self-reliant
instead
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that in this modern world people are getting dependent on each other, while others think that this world makes them more independent of each other.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
436 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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