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Some people think that hosting an international sports event is good for the country, while some people think it is bad. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

International sports event is a part of international cooperation where countries share there bonding and make relationship strong. Few people say that organising international sports event is beneficial for host country, whereas other think that it has bad consequences. I discuss both views and I personally believe that International sports event has few drawback but benefits are far more. Those people who support international sports hosting for these reasons. Firstly, when international event are organising than host country need to be prepared all facilities such as staduim, practice grounds, Iiving facilities for foreign players and many more. Host country spend money for country overall development. Secondly, when the tournment finished these facilities are used by local. For example-Delhi Commonwealth. Those people who opine that hosting international sports have bad effect on host country because country spend alot of money on these events which cause other departments to suffer. Money which spend on international event used for development of country in the other sectors such Medical, education, under -construction areas like roads and many more. Secondly, It is a threat of terrorism because host country has the responsibility to protection of foreign people. I personally believe that, sports on global level are beneficial for host country. International sports gives the fame to the host country to all over the world and host country become a part of global village. Moreover, international sports means foreign people who spend their money on the facilities of host country. Foreign people means foreign currency which helps in host country economy development. Furthermore, these types of events become the attraction of tourists and tourism incresase. In concluded, the international sports event has many benefits and few drawback. These event organised after a long time gap during these time government solve the problem of other sectors
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
International
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sports
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event
is a part of
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international
cooperation where
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countries
share there bonding and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
relationship strong. Few
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people
say that
Possible spelling mistake. ‘organising’ is British English.
organising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
is beneficial for
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host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, whereas
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other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
consequences. I discuss both views and I
personally
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
has few
Use a comma before ‘but’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
drawback
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
benefits are far more.

Those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who support
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international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
hosting for these reasons.
Firstly
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
are
Possible spelling mistake. ‘organising’ is British English.
organising
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
need to
be prepared
all facilities such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
staduim
, practice grounds,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Iiving
facilities for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
players and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
overall
development.
Secondly
, when the
Possible spelling mistake found.
tournment
finished these facilities are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by local.
For example
-Delhi Commonwealth.

Those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who opine that hosting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
Possible spelling mistake found.
alot
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
which cause
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
departments to suffer.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Money
which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
sectors such Medical, education, under -construction areas like roads and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more.
Secondly
, It is a threat of terrorism
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
has the responsibility to protection of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

I
personally
believe that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
on global level are beneficial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
It seems that the correct verb form here is “give”.
gives
the fame to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
to all over the world and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
become a part of global village.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
means
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on the facilities of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If ‘people’ is plural here, don’t use the third-person singular verb.
means
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
currency which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
economy development.
Furthermore
, these types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
become the attraction of tourists and tourism
Possible spelling mistake found.
incresase
.

In concluded, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits and
Possible agreement error. The noun drawback seems to be countable; consider using: “few drawbacks”.
few drawback
. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
Possible spelling mistake. ‘organised’ is British English.
organised
after a long time gap during these time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
solve the problem of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph.
sectors

IELTS essay Some people think that hosting an international sports event is good for the country, while some people think it is bad.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
298 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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