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Some people think that high salary is important when choosing a company to work for, while others think that good working atmosphere is more important. Discuss both view points and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience

Some people think that high salary is important when choosing a company to work for, while others think that good working atmosphere is more important. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience 281j
The workplace makes a significant effect on employee's productivity while choosing a workplace a healthy atmosphere should be taken under care as compare to high paying rate. Some individuals argue totally different that salary is an integral part when selecting a company. In my opinion, I agree that a robust environment of a workplace is crucially ideal not only but it makes a huge impact on employee's nature, which compel a person to be more productive this essay will further discuss both facets with an appropriate example of a study from the Oxford University. On the one hand, few people think that high pay rates are essential while finding a job and a company because huge packages can very helpful to achieve the desired standards of lifestyle. Additionally, a person working for high wages could buy anything to makes their life comfortable. Furthermore, in today's world, everybody wants luxurious lifestyles and high payable jobs even when they just left university. For instance, a survey field by British students reflects that majority of youngsters wants huge income rate. On the other hand, some folks hold the view that work must be considered while applying for a job rather than a high salary because it creates a wast impact on a person's mental and physical health. Moreover, if a worker feels comfortable and cooperative at work then there is more possibility that he or she could make the company profitable. For example, a study conducted at Oxford University London, proves that people tend to be more productive who working in healthy workplace atmosphere than others. In conclusion, I personally believe that nevertheless money is important for all of us but therefore, a healthy and better workplace need to be chosen while looking for employment, so it would be easy to someone to work there in a homey environment.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workplace
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
a significant effect on employee's productivity while choosing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workplace
a healthy atmosphere should
be taken
under care as compare to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
paying rate.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
individuals argue
totally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
that salary is an integral part when selecting a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
. In my opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that a robust environment of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workplace
is
crucially
ideal not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
a huge impact on employee's nature, which compel a person to be more productive this essay will
further
discuss both facets with an appropriate example of a study from the Oxford University.

On the one hand, few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
pay rates are essential while finding a job and a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
huge packages can
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
helpful to achieve the desired standards of lifestyle.
Additionally
, a person working for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
wages could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
anything to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
their life comfortable.
Furthermore
, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's world, everybody wants luxurious lifestyles and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
payable jobs even when they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
university.
For instance
, a survey field by British students reflects that majority of youngsters wants huge income rate.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
folks hold the view that work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be considered
while applying for a job
rather
than a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
salary
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it creates a wast impact on a person's mental and physical health.
Moreover
, if a worker feels comfortable and cooperative at work then there is more possibility that he or she could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
profitable.
For example
, a study conducted at Oxford University London, proves that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend to be more productive who working in healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workplace
atmosphere than others.

In conclusion
, I
personally
believe that
nevertheless
money is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for all of us
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
therefore
, a healthy and better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workplace
need to
be chosen
while looking for employment,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it would be easy to someone to work there in a homey environment.
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IELTS essay Some people think that high salary is important when choosing a company to work for, while others think that good working atmosphere is more important. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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