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Some people think that government spend the income on the railway rather than roads. Do you agree or disagree.

Some people think that government spend the income on the railway rather than roads. PE7AK
It is generally argued by certain groups of masses that authorities ought to utilise income on the railways rather than roads. However, I tend to oppose this statement for the reasons mentioned in forthcoming paragraphs. To commence with, there are plethora of reasons why the government spend the income on the roads, first and foremost reason that regime should more money on the roads because it is a very necessary for individuals. To elaborate it, more and more people use the roads in daily life, and if the condition of roads are bad, individual face more difficulties as well as the chances of accident incline in roads. Similarly, masses scene comfortable on their own vehicles, they can go anytime anywhere with the help of their vehicles. Moreover, if the roads are small, individual face problem of traffic jam. Thus, lawmaker should spend money on the roads because it is a essential for each and every people. On the other hand, railways also play a important role of people's life. Many folks like to travel by train because it is a cheaper, save the time andfaster way of transportation. Sogovernment should provide all facilities in the train, I think some trains conditions are not very good so individual face difficulties over there. To conclude, despite government it should utilise income on railways due to bad conditions, yet spend more money on roads because roads are also important, mostly people like to travel on road so government should spend money on a roads.
It is
generally
argued by certain groups of masses that authorities ought to
Possible spelling mistake. 'utilise' is British English.
utilise
income on the railways
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
.
However
, I tend to oppose this statement for the reasons mentioned in forthcoming paragraphs.

To commence with, there are plethora of reasons why the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
the income on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
,
first
and foremost reason that regime should more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
necessary for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
. To elaborate it, more and more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
in daily life, and if the condition of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
face more difficulties
as well
as the chances of accident incline in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
.
Similarly
, masses scene comfortable on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
vehicles, they can go anytime anywhere with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of their vehicles.
Moreover
, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
face problem of traffic jam.
Thus
, lawmaker should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
essential for each and every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
On the other hand
, railways
also
play
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
folks like to travel by train
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is a cheaper, save the time
Possible spelling mistake found.
andfaster
way of transportation.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sogovernment
should provide all facilities in the train, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
trains conditions are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
face difficulties over there.
To conclude
, despite
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
it should
Possible spelling mistake. 'utilise' is British English.
utilise
income on railways due to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
conditions,
yet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
,
mostly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
like to travel on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that government spend the income on the railway rather than roads.

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
251 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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