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Some people think that giving aid to poor countries has positive effects, while others believe that international aid should be stopped. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.1

Some people think that giving aid to poor countries has positive effects, while others believe that international aid should be stopped. v. 1
In olden days students have done their professional degree in their own nation. Nowadays, the doors of other country's education system open Infront them. The indoor and outdoor learning methods are entirely different from each other. The changes in environment of study have some influence on the learning outcomes. The international studies help the student to learn multiple language. They would get to know the variations on cultures and lifestyles. At the same time, the people who prefer studying in abroad would able to adapt these kind of alterations. The majority of the nations provide skill oriented and outcome based training which gives quality improvement. Moreover, the foreign learning provides weighted for degree, while hiring job. For instance, Indian fields provide more opportunity to candidates who have graduated from other countries. Finally, it assists to maintain bonds with others. Although, foreign teaching has more merits, however, it has some negative impact on students. They might feel detached from their comfort zone, as home, family, and friends and it might induce pressure and tension over them. If the students do not have proper guidance and control, they would mislead and deviate rather than concentrating on goal. Though abroad provide quality improvement, it would be expensive as the home country health insurance may not cover abroad or problems related to credit transfer. Even if, learn language, they might get language barrier and cultural shock unless until they are able to cope with new surroundings. To conclude, the study system varies according to places. It might have disadvantages whereas, it helps in many ways to improve knowledge and skills and both have an impact on them who study in abroad.
In olden days
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have done their professional degree in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
nation. Nowadays, the doors of other country's education system open
Possible spelling mistake found.
Infront
them.

The indoor and outdoor learning methods are
entirely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from each other. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in environment of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
influence on the learning outcomes.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
to learn multiple language. They would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know the variations on cultures and lifestyles. At the same time, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who prefer studying in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
Did you mean "would be able"?
would able
to adapt
Did you mean "this kind" or "these kinds"?
these kind
of alterations. The majority of the nations
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
oriented and outcome based training which gives quality improvement.
Moreover
, the foreign learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provides
weighted for degree, while hiring job.
For instance
, Indian fields
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
more opportunity to candidates who have graduated from other countries.
Finally
, it assists to maintain bonds with others.

Although, foreign teaching has more merits,
however
, it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
feel detached from their comfort zone, as home, family, and friends and it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
induce pressure and tension over them. If the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
do not have proper guidance and control, they would mislead and deviate
rather
than concentrating on goal. Though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
quality improvement, it would be expensive as the home country health insurance may not cover
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
or problems related to credit transfer. Even if, learn language, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
language barrier and cultural shock unless until they are able to cope with new surroundings.

To conclude
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
system varies according to places. It
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
have disadvantages whereas, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and both have an impact on them who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that giving aid to poor countries has positive effects, while others believe that international aid should be stopped. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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