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Some people think that fittest and strongest individual and team can achieve success in sports, while others believe that success depends on mental attitude. v. 3

In the modern world, many people are reckoned to think that the key element of success is a mental attitude, while others feel that the physical strength and well-being can lead to the prosperity. After pondering this phenomenon, I believe that the balance between the mental well-being and physical training can lead to the success. On the one hand, it is true that being strong is crucial for the sportsmen and sportswomen. In this regard, they should be well prepared to become a champion or a winner. Furthermore, many types of sports, such as wrestling, martial arts and taekwondo, require being physically strong and durable. To illustrate, ordinary people cannot run for 3 km in 12 minutes, and they should train every day in order to get this accomplished. On the other hand, the key ingredient of prosperity is mental health. In this case, sportsmen should know how to beat their opponents and counterparts. That is to say, they should plan their every step in advance. Moreover, internal health is essential for being a champion in many types of sports such as boxing, jogging and swimming. To illustrate, these kinds of sports have many emotional moments and situations. Accordingly, the people should keep their emotion in such kinds of situations in order to not show their weaknesses. In conclusion, although many people tend to think that the fittest and strongest individual can be a winner, others feel that the internal health is vital for being a champion. However, in my opinion, I believe that the people should be efficient and productive in order to beat their opponents.

IELTS essay Some people think that fittest and strongest individual and team can achieve success in sports, while others believe that success depends on mental attitude. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.3

In the modern world,
many
people
are reckoned
to
think
that the key element of success is a mental attitude, while others feel that the physical strength and well-being can lead to the prosperity. After pondering this phenomenon, I believe that the balance between the mental well-being and physical training can lead to the success. On the one hand, it is true that being strong is crucial for the sportsmen and sportswomen. In this regard, they
should
be
well prepared
to become a champion or a winner.
Furthermore
,
many
types of sports, such as wrestling, martial arts and taekwondo, require being
physically
strong and durable. To illustrate, ordinary
people
cannot run for 3 km in 12 minutes, and they
should
train every day in order to
get
this accomplished.
On the other hand
, the key ingredient of prosperity is mental health.
In this case
, sportsmen
should
know how to beat their opponents and counterparts.
That is
to say, they
should
plan their every step in advance.
Moreover
, internal health is essential for being a champion in
many
types of sports such as boxing, jogging and swimming. To illustrate, these kinds of sports have
many
emotional moments and situations.
Accordingly
, the
people
should
keep
their emotion in such kinds of situations in order to not
show
their weaknesses.
In conclusion
, although
many
people
tend to
think
that the fittest and strongest individual can be a winner, others feel that the internal health is vital for being a champion.
However
, in my opinion, I believe that the
people
should
be efficient and productive in order to beat their opponents.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
33Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
4 paragraphs
267 words
9
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resources: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Band score ≥ 7
  • Band score ≤ 6
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