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Some people think that cultural traditions may be destroy when they are used as money making attractions aimed at tourists .others believe it is the only way to save these traditions . Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people think that cultural traditions may be destroy when they are used as money making attractions aimed at tourists. others believe it is the only way to save these traditions. Discuss both views and give your opinion R9bV
It is claimed by certain individuals that when cultural traditions are used for earning money from tourisms, then it may be diminished. However, opponents assert that it is the reliable method to preserve the culture. This essay will intends to analyse both the perspectives. wheareaa I give my opinion to the latter statement that tourists are important to keep alive tradition. The major noteworthy aspect is that tradition may destroy, when it is used for earning money from tourists. To support, in every museum there are various rules and regulations which help to save traditions, while some tourists disobey the rules because they do not have inner attachment with these things. Furthuremore, modification of buildings and things which belong to culture is important because it help to attract more international people. As a result, traditions loose its original identity. On the flip side, attracting more tourists is the best way to preserve the culture. To elaborate, if majority of people visit at those places which represent traditional culture, it help to boost the economy of that country and also the culture of that nation can be spread all over the world. Moreover, local people can also incline their earning smoothly. For instance, it is stated from recent survey that in India 10, 000 people are working in museums. so that museum is the source of income for them. Hence, living standard of people and economy level of country can be boost by attracting more tourisms. To conclude, it can be reiterated that although there are fewer chances of destroying cultural traditions, it rise the livelihood of indigenous people.
It
is claimed
by certain individuals that when cultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for earning money from
Possible spelling mistake found.
tourisms
, then it may
be diminished
.
However
, opponents assert that it is the reliable method to preserve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
. This essay will intends to
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
both the perspectives.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
wheareaa
I give my opinion to the latter statement that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
alive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tradition
. The major noteworthy aspect is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tradition
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
, when it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for earning money from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
. To support, in every museum there are various
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
disobey the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they do not have inner attachment with these things.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Furthuremore
, modification of buildings and things which belong to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
Did you mean "helps"?
help
to attract more international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
Did you mean "lose" (= miss, waste, suffer the loss etc.)?
loose
its original identity. On the flip side, attracting more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
is the best way to preserve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
. To elaborate, if
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
visit at those places which represent traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
, it
Did you mean "helps"?
help
to boost the economy of that country and
also
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
of that nation can
be spread
all over the world.
Moreover
, local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
also
incline their earning
smoothly
.
For instance
, it
is stated
from recent survey that in India 10, 000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are working in museums.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
so
that museum is the source of income for them.
Hence
, living standard of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and economy level of country can be
Consider using a past participle here: "boosted".
boost
by attracting more
Possible spelling mistake found.
tourisms
.
To conclude
, it can
be reiterated
that although there are fewer chances of destroying cultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
, it
Did you mean "rises"?
rise
the livelihood of indigenous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that cultural traditions may be destroy when they are used as money making attractions aimed at tourists. others believe it is the only way to save these traditions. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
268 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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