Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people think that advertising on TV is useful for viewers, while others disagree. Discuss both sides and give your opinion v.1

Some people think that advertising on TV is useful for viewers, while others disagree. 1
Some people think that watching advertisement on the television has a significant amount of benefits, while others think that it has numerous negative side effects. In my view, it's good to watch ads over small screen industry for a limited period of time. However, this essay will discuss both views of the statement. On the one hand, there are a large number of positive impacts by watching the adverts over the TV's. Firstly, Ads will bring the break for the continuous watching of the screen. It's good to have a small gap for the viewer since they have been watching various programmes from the early hours of the day. For instance, consider any movie, which usually took around 3 hours so it's difficult to watch for longer period without any pause. Secondly, by watching the ad-programs, one can increase their thinking abilities. People will start brushing their visual as well presentation efforts with a unique way, particularly in children, their analytical capabilities will increase to higher levels. On the other hand, the public will start using the negative feedback products in the adverts. With limited information only, people tend to use instantly as a result, it will lead to the wrong impression on the adverts. In addition that, people will loss their interest to watch the TV's if suddenly any ad came to screen when they are watching any of their favourite programmes. Moreover, when watching a series on the small screen at home, by adding adverts time it usually taking more time than the actual hours of program. To conclude, in my view, by considering the positives and negative effects, watching ads over TVs at a reasonable amount of period will bring a healthy environment to public.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that watching advertisement on the television has a significant amount of benefits, while others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it has numerous
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
side effects. In my view, it's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
ads over
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
screen
industry for a limited period of time.
However
, this essay will discuss both views of the statement.

On the one hand, there are
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impacts by watching the adverts over the TV's.
Firstly
, Ads will bring the break for the continuous watching of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
screen
. It's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
gap for the viewer since they have been watching various
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
from the early hours of the day.
For instance
, consider any movie, which
usually
took around 3 hours
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it's difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
for longer period without any pause.
Secondly
, by watching the ad-programs, one can increase their thinking abilities.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
brushing their visual
as well
presentation efforts with a unique way,
particularly
in children, their analytical capabilities will increase to higher levels.

On the other hand
, the public will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
using the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
feedback products in the adverts. With limited information
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
instantly
as a result
, it will lead to the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
impression on the adverts. In
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
addition
that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will loss their interest to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
the TV's if
suddenly
any ad came to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
screen
when they are watching any of their
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
.
Moreover
, when watching a series on the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
screen
at home, by adding adverts time it
usually
taking more time than the actual hours of program.

To conclude
, in my view, by considering the positives and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects, watching ads over TVs at a reasonable amount of period will bring a healthy environment to public.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that advertising on TV is useful for viewers, while others disagree. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts