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Some people think that a person improves their intellectual skills more when doing group activities. To what extent do you agree? Use specific details and examples to explain your view. v.7

Some people think that a person improves their intellectual skills more when doing group activities. Use specific details and examples to explain your view. v. 7
Some people opine that it is better to make friends with people who share their likes and interests. Others opine that it is nice to have a friend who sometimes opposes their views. In my opinion, having friends who disagree with us on some topics can give us a better perspective of the situation we are in. There are certainly several benefits to having a friend who agrees with us on most things. For example, friends with similar interests can watch a movie or plan an outing together. Since they have the same taste, there are fewer chances of conflicts between them. In this day and age when most people have stressful jobs, being in a stress free friendship is essential to save our sanity. On the other hand, a friend who always agrees with us on all topics can sometimes do us more harm than good. Every one of us has our shortcomings and all of us make mistakes. If all of our friends always think like us, there will be no one to guide us to the right path when we go astray. For example, someone may be addicted to the nasty habit of smoking. He is more likely to choose friends who share the same liking for tobacco. Unfortunately, this does not help him in any way. As time passes by, his addiction to smoking will become more and more intense and he will develop various health problems. By contrast, if he had a friend who did not smoke, he was more likely to have quit this deadly habit years ago. Thus, it is evident that sometimes friends with dissimilar interests and views can be beneficial to us. In conclusion, having friends who agree with us certainly makes our lives less stressful. However, it is essential to have at least a few friends who do not think like us because they can give us better perspectives on life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
opine that it is better to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
share their likes and interests. Others opine that it is nice to have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
opposes their views. In my opinion, having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
disagree with us on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
topics can give us a better perspective of the situation we are in.

There are
certainly
several benefits to having a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with us on most things.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
with similar interests can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
a movie or plan an outing together. Since they have the same taste, there are fewer chances of conflicts between them. In this day and age when most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have stressful jobs, being in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
free friendship is essential to save our sanity.

On the other hand
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with us on all topics can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
do us more harm than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
. Every one of us has our shortcomings and all of us
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
mistakes. If all of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
like us, there will be no one to guide us to the right path when we go astray.
For example
, someone may
be addicted
to the nasty habit of smoking. He is more likely to choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
share the same liking for tobacco. Unfortunately, this does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
him in any way. As time passes by, his addiction to smoking will become more and more
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
intense and
he will develop various health problems. By contrast, if he had a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
did not smoke, he was more likely to have quit this deadly habit years ago.
Thus
, it is evident that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
with dissimilar interests and views can be beneficial to us.

In conclusion
, having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with us
certainly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
less stressful.
However
, it is essential to have at least a few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
like us
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can give us better perspectives on life.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that a person improves their intellectual skills more when doing group activities. Use specific details and examples to explain your view. v. 7

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
321 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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