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Some people think success in life comes from hard work and determination. Others think other factors are more important. Write an essay of AT LEAST 250 words to discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think success in life comes from hard work and determination. Others think other factors are more important. Write an essay of AT LEAST 250 words to JVn0B
The secret of success has long been deemed a source of controversy. While many claim that hard work and devotion are the key factors, there is a growing consensus that other elements play a more integral role in reaping success. In this essay, I will expound on these aforementioned viewpoints before giving my own opinion. On the one hand, it is indisputable that working wholeheartedly and consistently is elemental when it comes to success. First, hard work enables people to achieve valuable knowledge and experience in aspects of life. To illustrate, if young students practise some kinds of assignment, they have the tendency to master those kinds of exercises and then get high scores in exams. Besides, determination keeps people undiscouraged and motivate them to continue forging ahead. On the other hand, these following reasons can be adduced to explain the importance of other features. In the first place, experience is undeniably crucial contributor to success. That experience brings more extensive scope of knowledge and hornes myriads of much-needed skills is an irrefutable fact. What is more, finance appears to be a fundamental component, especially for start-ups and entrepreneurs. Sufficient funding seems to be a precaution against losses and bankruptcy in the early years. In conclusion, it is my firm conviction that besides work ethics and commitment, extra elements such as money or experience should not be ignored. Victory does not necessitate only hard work and dedication, but also multifarious extra qualities.
The secret of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
has long
been deemed
a source of controversy. While
Possible agreement error. The noun claim seems to be countable; consider using: "many claims".
many claim
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and devotion are the key factors, there is a growing consensus that other elements play a more integral role in reaping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
. In this essay, I will expound on these aforementioned viewpoints
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
giving my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
opinion.

On the one hand, it is indisputable that working
wholeheartedly
and
consistently
is elemental when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
.
First
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
enables
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to achieve valuable knowledge and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
in aspects of life. To illustrate, if young students
Possible spelling mistake. 'practise' is British English.
practise
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
kinds of assignment, they have the tendency to master those kinds of exercises and then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
high scores in exams.
Besides
, determination
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
undiscouraged
and motivate them to continue forging ahead.

On the other hand
, these following reasons can
be adduced
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
the importance of other features. In the
first
place,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
is
undeniably
crucial contributor to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
. That
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
brings more extensive scope of knowledge and
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "horns", the plural form of the noun 'horn'?
hornes
myriads of much-needed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
is an irrefutable fact.
What is more
, finance appears to be a fundamental component,
especially
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
-ups and entrepreneurs. Sufficient funding seems to be a precaution against losses and bankruptcy in the early years.

In conclusion
, it is my firm conviction that
besides
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
ethics and commitment, extra elements such as money or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
should not be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
. Victory does not necessitate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and dedication,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
multifarious extra qualities.
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IELTS essay Some people think success in life comes from hard work and determination. Others think other factors are more important. Write an essay of AT LEAST 250 words to

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
242 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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