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Some people think studying in groups is better, while some think self-study is better for school students. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.8

Some people think studying in groups is better, while some think self-study is better for school students. v. 8
A good education is the most valuable asset a person can have. One can become well-educated only through hard work and a lot of effort. It is a process that lasts for a person’s whole lifetime, which starts at an early age. A large part of it comes from the school period, so naturally, teachers and professors in schools question themselves what is the best and most efficient way their students can learn about a specific matter. Some people think studying in groups is better, while some think students should study individually. I think a good education comes with a mix of both of these things. However, I believe that group learning needs to be more encouraged. Since the beginning of human civilization, our achievements and advancements have always come from a group effort. Rarely does one person achieve great things completely by himself. Even when famous scientists came to revolutionary conclusions in their field, they mostly relied on work done by less known experts who lived before them. Greatness simply brings too much load for an individual to carry, because it is in our nature to work together as a unit. Having this in mind, I think school programs should emphasize students learning and working together. It makes learning more efficient and fun because students interact and discuss with each other. Furthermore, teamwork in schools will prepare them for their future careers or jobs in which skills which are required for working as an organized group are a necessity. Nevertheless, self-learning is important as well. Some skills are difficult to learn in a group and need to be exercised until one has obtained and understood them on a deeper level. It might be hard for mentors to distinguish if some student in their class has not learned the matter properly or completely, so I think students should still devote some of their time on self-learning and self-testing. I think that both self-learning and group learning are essential parts of the educational system. However, more and more schools are dismissing rigorous individual learning and testing. Authorities are implementing more teamwork among young people, which is a very good thing in my opinion. Hopefully, that trend will continue in the future as well.
A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
education is the most valuable asset a person can have. One can become well-educated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
through
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
effort. It is a process that lasts for a person’s whole lifetime, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
at an early age. A large part of it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
period,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
naturally
, teachers and professors in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
question themselves what is the best and most efficient way their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can learn about a specific matter.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
studying in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
is better, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should study
individually
. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
education
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
with a mix of both of these things.
However
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
needs to be more encouraged.

Since the beginning of human civilization, our achievements and advancements have always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
effort. Rarely does one person achieve great things completely by himself. Even when
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
scientists came to revolutionary conclusions in their field, they
mostly
relied on work done by less known experts who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
them. Greatness
simply
brings too much load for an individual to carry,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is in our nature to work together as a unit. Having this in mind, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
programs should emphasize
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
and working together. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
more efficient and fun
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
interact and discuss with each other.
Furthermore
, teamwork in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
will prepare them for their future careers or jobs in which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
which
are required
for working as an organized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
are a necessity.

Nevertheless
, self-learning is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
as well
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
are difficult to learn in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
and need to
be exercised
until one has obtained and understood them on a deeper level. It might be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for mentors to distinguish if
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
has not learned the matter
properly
or completely,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should
still
devote
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of their time on self-learning and self-testing.

I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that both self-learning and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
are essential parts of the educational system.
However
, more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
are dismissing rigorous individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
and testing. Authorities are implementing more teamwork among young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, which is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
thing in my opinion.
Hopefully
, that trend will continue in the future
as well
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
28Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think studying in groups is better, while some think self-study is better for school students. v. 8

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
372 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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