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Some people think studying in groups is better, while some think self study is better for school students. Discuss both sides and give your opinion. v.4

Some people think studying in groups is better, while some think self study is better for school students. v. 4
A unique aspect of college culture is studying in groups, whilst some students prefer self-study. Both styles do have the advantages in the study, but the colleges usually tend to encourage teamwork. On the one hand, self-study can boost students’ self-esteem. In particular, they can take control over their own learning. And when students have control, they become even more interested in learning and more confident learners. They are able to see themselves as an independent person who is able to learn new things without anyone helping them. This can be a major motivation boost for students. On the other hand, group-study requires the cooperation from students. Many students begin to realize the abundance of material that was covered during their academic terms. It is at that moment that many students break down, feel incredibly overwhelmed, and begin questioning their academic future. They were advised to create groups of peers who all come together to work on essays, exams, readings, quizzes and general homework. The peers have different learning styles and can help others to better comprehend material, and vice versa. Furthermore, study groups can be either intensely quiet or extremely loud, and rarely an in-between. They can range from a lengthy far-reaching conversation which allows students to debate with friends for finding solutions together to seemingly endless hours of doing homework in silence as individuals in the company of friends. Overall, self-study has a merit of building the independence whilst group-study has a benefit towards collaboration among members but not implies the dependence. While everyone can be self-learner, the study groups require more than two in order to have the sharing. Hence, the teamwork is an essential skill for the college life.
A unique aspect of college culture is studying in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
, whilst
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
prefer self-study. Both styles do have the advantages in the study,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the colleges
usually
tend to encourage teamwork.

On the one hand, self-study can boost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students’
self-esteem.
In particular
, they can take control over their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
learning. And when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have control, they become even more interested in learning and more confident learners. They are able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
themselves as an independent person who is able to learn new things without anyone helping them. This can be a major motivation boost for students.

On the other hand
, group-study requires the cooperation from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. 
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
to realize the abundance of material that
was covered
during their academic terms. It is at that moment that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
break down, feel
incredibly
overwhelmed, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
questioning their academic future. They
were advised
to create
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
of peers who all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
together to work on essays, exams, readings, quizzes and general homework. The peers have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
learning styles and can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
others to better comprehend material, and vice versa.
Furthermore
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
can be either
intensely
quiet or
extremely
loud, and rarely an in-between. They can range from a lengthy far-reaching conversation which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to debate with friends for finding solutions together to
seemingly
endless hours of doing homework in silence as individuals in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
of friends.

Overall
, self-study has a merit of building the independence whilst group-study has a benefit towards collaboration among members
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not implies the dependence. While everyone can be self-learner, the study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
require more than two in order to have the sharing.
Hence
, the teamwork is an essential
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
for the college life.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think studying in groups is better, while some think self study is better for school students. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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